Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Pumpkin

Jon Stewart Obliterates McCain's Acceptance Speech

This clip clearly illustrates that Candidate McCain is absolutely, undeniably no different than the asshat currently sitting near the red phone waiting to push the button.

George W. Bush = John McCain = George W. Bush = John McCain = George W. Bush = John McCain = George W. Bush = John McCain = George W. Bush = John McCain


Bulb

Flashback Video: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 2008 Election Early


Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 2008 Election Early

Comment: Humor, or parody, is often the best way to convey the truth. This video presents an excellent example.


Stormtrooper

New Jersey cops kick in door over cockatoo's cries for help

Trenton, NJ - Cries for help inside a Trenton, N.J., home turned out to be for the birds.

Neighbors called police Wednesday morning after hearing a woman's persistent cry of "Help me! Help me!" coming from a house. Officers arrived and when no one answered the door, they kicked it in to make a rescue.

But instead of a damsel in distress, officers found a caged cockatoo with a convincing call.

It wasn't the first time the 10-year-old bird named Luna said something that brought authorities to the home of owner Evelyn DeLeon.

About seven years ago, the bird cried like a baby for hours, leading to reports of a possible abandoned baby and a visit to the home by state child welfare workers. But it was only Luna practicing a newfound sound, DeLeon says.

Smiley

Black bear busts secret Utah pot farm

Panguitch, Utah - One Utah community is cheering a special bear - but don't call him Smokey.

Investigators say a large black bear raided a clandestine marijuana growing operation so often that it chased the grower away.

"This bear is definitely law-enforcement minded," said Garfield County Sheriff Danny Perkins. "If I can find this bear I'm going to deputize him."

Deputies found food containers ripped apart and strewn everywhere, cans with bear teeth marks, claw marks and bear prints across the Garfield County camp on Tuesday.

Book

Greek rural postmen top odd book title list

London - It may not be a best-seller, but "Greek Rural Postmen and Their Cancellation Numbers" has won a literary accolade: oddest book title of the past 30 years.

The book topped a poll to find the weirdest-ever winner of Britain's Diagram Prize for unusually monickered volumes.

It beat previous winners including "Proceedings of the Second International Workshop on Nude Mice" and "How Green Were the Nazis?" in an online vote. The results were announced Friday by trade magazine The Bookseller, which organizes the prize.

The runner-up was "People Who Don't Know They're Dead." Third place went to "How To Avoid Huge Ships."

The Bookseller's charts editor, Philip Stone, said _ possibly with tongue in cheek _ that the winning book may have benefited from Britons' concern about the closure of rural post offices across the country.

"I sincerely believe that this title provides further proof to the current government that the British public are passionate about the maintenance and continuation of local mail delivery services," he said. "And not just nationally, but internationally."

Play

Leave Sarah Palin Alone!

A parody on the famous "Leave Britney Alone" video. (contains strong language)

Take 2

Inside the Republican Mind: Palin & Russia (Take 5)

Take 1

Cindy McCain: Alaska Gov Gets National Security Issues Because Of State's Proximity To Russia
Aug. 31, 2008
Associated Press

Cindy McCain said Sunday that Republican vice presidential pick Sarah Palin understands what's at stake in national security issues in part because she is governor of Alaska, located some 300 miles from Russia.

The wife of soon-to-be GOP presidential nominee Sen. John McCain also said she's "offended" by Democrats calling her husband elitist because of the number of homes their family owns.

Magic Hat

Wisconsin couple each hit lottery - twice

Madison, Wis. - A woman and her accountant husband who claims he's developed a formula for lottery picks have each claimed $350,000 jackpots - twice.

Verlyn and Judith Adamson claimed two $350,000 jackpots on Monday because each held a winning ticket in the state SuperCash drawing last Saturday. They didn't mention at the time that they also held two more of the winning tickets.

Bizarro Earth

US: Iowa man accused of offering bribe with sandwich

Iowa City police said a man who was driving drunk tried to bribe a police officer - with a sandwich. Police said a 25-year-old man was charged with drunken driving early Sunday morning after an officer saw him driving with his headlights off and pulled him over.

Black Cat

Cat survives 70-mile trip under owner's truck

A cat survived a 2 1/2-hour trip on a spare tire under her owner's truck. Gil Smith recently drove from his Gilbert home 70 miles away for a business meeting in Kearny. When he got out of the truck, he heard a cat in distress and realized it was his.