I was born in America in nineteen forty-seven.
I am a self-educated high school dropout. Since withdrawing from the public school system nearly fifty years ago, I have immersed myself in the study of history, sociology, anthropology, economics, politics and whatever else took my interest. Education is wasted on the young.
I have also trained myself to a reasonable level of competence in the use of several computer graphics and image editing programs. I am familiar and reasonably proficient with Bryce, Poser, Corel Photo-Paint (which, in my opinion, is far superior to any version of Photoshop) and a number of other, more obscure, graphic aps.
I've also acquired a modicum of skill with some electronic music applications. I've focused primarily on Sony Acid Pro, but also have used Ableton Live and Propellerhead Reason.
I was raised in a blue-collar family, neighborhood and town. It was a time when workers were at least given token respect and appreciation by those who lived off their labor. A man with a decent job was able to provide a good home and life for his family. The moneyed capitalist elite had not yet redrawn the class barriers of feudal England, but they were working on it.
Those days are gone.
I grew up in a time of transition. I found myself among the first of the “latch key kids” when it became necessary for my mother to join my father at work. Costs had begun to rise while earnings began to stagnate. I spent my life at labor, working long hours and earning less instead of more with each passing year. I have been a “common laborer” all my life and will be proud of the fact to my dying day.
I have seen America transformed from what seemed a shining beacon of hope and freedom to a dark and vicious aggressor nation, ruled by an utterly ruthless capitalist regime seeking absolute global hegemony. Appearances can be deceiving. America was a beautiful, shiny apple that was rotten at the core.
Now I live in amerika. The shine is gone and darkness prevails. At the beginning of a new millennium, we have regressed to a society of medieval mores and a rigid class system. We are entering a new Dark Age, which promises to rival the old in suffering, depravity and oppression.
We have technology at our disposal that could help create a world civilization of peace, equality and prosperity while preserving a beautiful, natural, ecologically sound planet. We choose instead to use that power to rape, pillage and destroy all that we see. We have chosen war rather than peace, fear rather than joy, greed rather than generosity and death over life.
As I enter “the autumn of my madness”, I am overcome with sorrow. Every time I look at my grandson or hear his laughter, tears fill my eyes. My heart is crushed at the thought of what tomorrow holds for him.
I am witnessing the end of an epoch.
The dream I had, of peace in my lifetime, has been replaced by despair for the future.