Deepak Chopra

Don't sniff it, Deepak!
New Age poster boy and spiritual heartthrob Deepak Chopra was rushed to hospital last night, after detaching the retina in his third-eye.

Chopra, who advocates against excess materialism, was meditating in his 2.5 million dollar mansion on Friday night when the incident occurred.

He told journalists in his usual rambling fashion, 'I was perforating infinity at an atomic level, I was about to enter the quantum leap, fusing together mechanical physics and meditative chi, when the vibrations became too much, causing me to sneeze extremely aggressively'.

He was advised by friends and family to receive hospital treatment, but he says he is going to use quantum healing instead. Big Karma are yet to clarify whether a fabricated theory can solve a fabricated medical condition, but we will keep you posted.