© Waterford Whispers News“C’MON guys, gimme a shot? I can’t go back to McDonald’s”.
Having recently completed an unsuccessful trial at McDonald's, Mr Donald Trump had pinned his hopes on working in the trash accumulation business.
"I like giving people a chance, but I'm no sucker. This guy just had to put the trash in the truck but boy does guy have a mouth on him. Talking about Haitians eating dogs, telling people to drink bleach, constantly saying he's not Hitler, real wacko stuff. That's not good for business," explained sanitation company owner Damien Fucelli.
Attempting to pad out his CV and application Trump had written 'yes' to the question 'have you completed successful trials elsewhere? Is so please list' but declined to specify that he was referring to being found civilly liable for sexual assault.
"Look guy, you expect me to trust you with such an important job? Sanitation goes wrong and people die buddy, trash can be toxic. Why don't you try something more your speed, something less important like president or something," responded Fucelli to 79-Year-old Trump who had dropped to his knees to beg for the job, insisting he couldn't face going home to a wife who hates him only to tell her he was still unemployed.
Which is not to say that Republicans are any funnier, if you consider one of their opinions about Puerto Rico as an example of humor. Natch.