Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn
© Peter Nicholls / ReutersJeremy Corbyn
How the mighty have fallen. Just a few weeks ago, Stalinist firebrand, Jeremy Corbyn, was the Golden Boy of the British Left.

But now, Corbyn is coming under fire for his alleged links to extremists and racists.

Corbyn has already confessed that he's been in the same room as people who've gone on to say bad things.

But it doesn't stop there. Here, on this blog, we can exclusively reveal 6 more links Corbyn doesn't want you to know about.

1. GENGHIS KHAN

Genghis khan
© Mark Fiddaman
It's well known that Mr. Corbyn resides in Islington, North London.

But here's a fact the Corbyn Camp have kept quiet: Islington lies 51° North of the Equator — the same latitudinal coordinate as Mongolia, home of murderous 13th-century warlord, Genghis Khan.

We call upon Corbyn to clarify his links to Mr. Khan, and to confirm that he has no current plans to unite the tribes of the Steppe and lay waste to Central Asia.

2. OSWALD MOSLEY

Oswald mosley
© Mark Fiddaman
Mr. Corbyn is thought to have longstanding links to the British Labour Party, whose former members include comedy despot, Oswald Mosley. After a brief stint in Labour, Mosley quit to form the British Union of Fascists. In 1936, he married one of the Mitford sisters at an exclusive ceremony attended by Hitler and Goebbels.

Here's a chilling fact: Had Corbyn been alive in 1936, and been in the Labour Party, and had he met Oswald Mosley, and had the two been on good terms and kept in touch when Mosley left, and had Mosley then invited Corbyn to his wedding for old times' sake, and had Corbyn been available and wanted to go...Corbyn could have been sat beside Hitler at Mosley's wedding.

Would you vote for a man who might have shared best-man duties with the Führer, had history been completely different? We didn't think so.

3. GEORGE FORMBY

George formby
© Mark Fiddaman
Mr. Corbyn celebrates his birthday on May 26th - the same birthday as known pornographer, George Formby.

Formby is best known for his smutty ukulele number When I'm Cleaning Windows, whose casual references to ladies' nighties and their being seen got it banned by the BBC in 1936.

A spokesperson for Mr. Corbyn explained that "sharing someone's birthday doesn't necessarily mean sharing their views. It certainly doesn't mean that Jeremy himself would, if elected, indulge in acts of covert stepladder-mounted voyeurism."

But can we take that chance? Until the facts are on the table, this blog says: a vote for Corbyn is a vote for perverts posing as tradesmen everywhere.

4. A YAK

a yak
© Mark Fiddaman
During the nineteen-fifties, Corbyn often visited his local zoo, where, a witness claims, he once had a good long look at a yak.

Although mostly docile, yaks can become aggressive when their young are threatened. The wooly yobs, often horned, are thought to gore around four people a year. Corbyn initially denied ever having met a yak, but later backtracked, giving the lame excuse that he "thought it was a bison".

Until Corbyn apologises to victims of yak-goring and their families, he will have their blood on his hands.

5. SOME PEAS
some peas
© Mark Fiddan
At a charity supper in 1993, Corbyn accidentally tripped up at the buffet table, causing his elbow to become submerged in some peas. While healthy in moderation, peas can contribute to weight gain in children, if consumed in vast quantities, or in conjunction with lard. Why does Corbyn condone childhood obesity?

Is it because, as PM, he would require a generation of hefty youngsters to pull carts as they toil in his socialist salt mines? Yes. It almost certainly is.

6. THE UNIVERSE

universe
© Mark Fiddaman
Mr. Corbyn is thought to own property in the universe and can often be seen dining there.

The universe, scientists say, could one day run out of thermodynamic free energy, a process known as the "heat death", which would wipe out every living being in the cosmos. "This is typical loony left," writes Seb Twunt in the Telegraph. "They're so hell-bent on reducing inequality that they're prepared to support the total destruction of all organic life to do it."

We ask Corbyn to publicly condemn the annihilation of life as we know it.

Until his position on the heat death of the universe is clarified, we can't know that Mr. Corbyn won't be rubbing his hands in gleeful anticipation of complete oblivion.
Mark Fiddaman is a "Philosopher's apprentice, writer and crank. Based in Oxford, UK."