© SOTT
Running Time: 01:35:25
Download: MP3 — 87.4 MB
Don't Panic! Lighten Up!
Running Time: 01:35:25
Download: MP3 — 87.4 MB
© Fedor Selivanov / Alamy Stock Photo
"As we have stated, Greenland is not for sale," a spokesperson for the Danish government said on Friday. "We have noted, however, that during the Trump regime pretty much everything in the United States, including its government, has most definitely been for sale."
"Denmark would be interested in purchasing the United States in its entirety, with the exception of its government," the spokesperson added.
The all-seeing eye!
The servant of Morgoth said the wall is to prevent one from simply walking into Mordor, pointing out that the land of Mordor has an "immigration crisis" as rumors of a caravan of nine members of a fellowship was headed his direction. He says the looming wall will run all the way around the natural mountainous barrier surrounding the country to ensure no "bad apples" get through.
© SPAS TV channel; Wikipedia
Father Artemy Vladimirov and Charles Darwin
Father Artemy Vladimirov and Charles Darwin
Being dead for more than a century seemingly poses no communication barrier for the renowned British naturalist, who recently shared some wisdom found in the afterlife with a Russian priest... according to the cleric himself. Artemy Vladimirov offered a vivid recollection of the 'conversation' with Darwin during a Russian Christian TV program that he hosts.
© Reuters / Maxim Shemetov
If the mainstream media is to be believed, the Kremlin's network of hackers and bots could give the Illuminati a run for its money. When its operatives aren't electing British prime ministers, embarrassing American politicians on debate night and flogging dildos to undermine democracy, they're overseeing a team of assets earning their borscht openly in the United States.
Thankfully, the intrepid detectives in the American press have named and shamed these double agents. We've compiled a list here.
© The Babylon Bee
"If we don't take action, then in 12 years we will have to explain why the world hasn't ended and come up with a new number," one UN scientist warned. "This is a very serious threat, and we urge everyone to hand control of the economy to the government immediately before we have no more time left to change the timeline again."
© Syńbâd/twitter
A man claiming to be Jesus, the Son of God, is currently touring South Africa, according to photos and videos shared by locals across social media.
One user recounted that a Kenyan pastor found "Jesus" walking on the streets of Kenya and invited him to a church.
“Is it possible for a country to die of embarrassment?”
Famous for his slew of gaffes over the years, many expected his prime ministership to be replete with memeworthy moments, but the Sun has taken things too far for even the most cynical online trolls judging by reaction on Twitter.
"Is it possible for a country to die of embarrassment?" wrote one sickened user. "You'll never guess what the sun baby in the teletubbies looks like now," another person quipped as many others took the opportunity to have a pop at the Sun's graphics department.
© Cherwell
Trialed and tested on over 10,000 low earning citizens since 2011, Fine Gael detailed all the benefits of opting out of the 'rental rat race', in favour of 'cosy sleeping blankets' and 'rainproof tents'.
"Students wishing to live in actual accommodation in Dublin will need wealthy parents," Minister for Housing Eoghan Murphy warned culchies, "the price of free education is at an all time high, so if you're not rich, or a lottery winner, please consider homelessness for the few months of the academic year you're up in the big smoke - see how ye get on".
Comment: Galloway: You'd have to be mad to think Boris Johnson is the answer to Britain's problems