© The OnionMore and more Onion writers feel they aren't comedians anymore, but are actually just alcoholic journalists with low self-esteem and too many cats.
"The core of comedy is the ability to take something true and exaggerate it," said one writer. "The problem is, with Obama's Administration, it's already so far out there, we'd have to write headlines like: Obama Care will put a unicorn in every house."
People have been noticing the incredible drop in chuckles from reading articles and comedy pieces from The Onion because: "they're too believable these days."
"We keep having to go to insane extremes just to get a smirk. Then 5 minutes later John Kerry opens his mouth and talks like he's quoting from us!", revealed a dispirited editor from The Onion.
There is a point when you can't put humor (or any kind of spin) to it anymore and must accept grief.
Grief of course, is hard on the economy, as people tend to stop doing what they're trained and ordered to do. This scares everybody.
And yet, grief will have the final say.
Grief and death.
ned