Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Crusader

Canadian artist's "obscene jesus" arouses religious groups

Terence Koh, the provocative Canadian darling of the New York art scene, has aroused controversy in Britain after a top gallery displayed one of his sculptures showing Jesus with an erect penis.

©Andrew H. Walker, Getty Images
Terence Koh has generated outrage but also acclaim in London and New York.

Smiley

US: Shouting Macaw scares off burglar at pet store

Watch dogs are a pretty common first line of security for U.S. homes and businesses. Watch birds not so much. But that didn't stop Merlin, a seven-year-old blue-and-gold macaw who scared off a burglar at a Massachusetts pet store this week.

Intruders smashed the front window of Pet Palace in Leominster, about 45 miles west of Boston, and as they entered the store the bird began to shout, said store manager Lori Oltman on Thursday.

Bell

Greek priest given suspended sentence for loud bell

A Greek Orthodox priest was given a suspended 70-day sentence after residents complained he rang his church bell too loudly and too often, national television reported on Friday.

Residents of a nearby resort town filed a lawsuit against the priest of the Assumption Church on Mount Pelion in Central Greece.

Court-appointed specialists measured the noise, and found that the volume exceeded the maximum permissible level set out by Greek law.

People

Twins Unwittingly Got Married in Britain

London - Twins who were separated at birth got married without realizing they were brother and sister, a lawmaker said, urging more information be provided on birth certificates for adopted children. A court annulled the British couple's union after they discovered their true relationship, Lord David Alton said.

Sherlock

'Priest' with 7.7 lbs of coke arrested

Amsterdam - A man claiming to be a Catholic priest was arrested Friday at Amsterdam's Schiphol Airport after he was caught carrying 7.7 pounds of cocaine under his robes, a spokesman for Dutch border police said.

The suspect, whose identity was being traced, initially refused to undergo a routine body check "for religious reasons," spokesman Robert van Kapel said.

Bizarro Earth

Phobia catalogue reveals bizarre list of fears

It is enough to give someone an irrational fear of long and faintly improbable-sounding words.

A catalogue of unusual phobias reveals that the fear of long words is known as hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia.

The condition, sometimes shortened to sesquippedaliophobia, can leave sufferers with shortness of breath, rapid breathing, an irregular heartbeat, sweating, nausea, and overall feelings of dread.

Among the bizarre crippling dreads listed on changethatsrightnow.com are the ridiculous sounding zemmiphobia, or fear of the great mole rat, and alektorophobia, or a fear of chickens.

Those with lutraphobia fear otters, those with globophobia fear balloons and those with pteronophobia fear of being tickled by feathers.

Battery

Make Way for the Q Wii N

The gadget-loving Queen has become HOOKED on Prince William's new Nintendo Wii games console.

Comment: Yes, girls just wanna have fun - even if the castle is on fire...

But for a moment, let's forget all that and have a look at the appropriately measured lighter side of Queen Elizabeth II.


Bizarro Earth

Poland: Man spots his wife during visit to brothel

A Polish man got the shock of his life when he visited a brothel and spotted his wife among the establishment's employees.

Polish tabloid Super Express said the woman had been making some extra money on the side while telling her husband she worked at a store in a nearby town.

Smiley

Satire: Bush Begins Preparations For Nation's Final Year

WASHINGTON - As his last term in office winds to a close, President Bush has directed White House aids and Cabinet staff to begin preparing for 2008, the nation's 232nd and final year in existence.

Alarm Clock

Boy glues himself to bed to avoid school

A 10-year-old Mexican boy was so determined not to return to school after the Christmas holiday that he glued his hand to his bed.

Sandra Palacios spent nearly two hours on Monday morning trying to free her son Diego's hand with water, oil and nail polish remover before calling the authorities in the northern city of Monterrey, said police chief Jorge Camacho.

"I didn't want to go to school because vacation was so much fun," Reforma newspaper quoted the boy as saying. However, paramedics managed to release him in time for class.