Don't Panic! Lighten Up!
Heinrich Mueller, 28, slid down the chute and ended up in an emergency incubator, triggering alarms among medical staff.
But instead of another unwanted newborn baby, they found Mueller smoking a cigarette.
He then fell asleep as staff worked out how to get him out of the incubator at the hospital in Dortmund.
It might be our feathered friends way of jumping on the global-warming band wagon - but nearly 60 % of us suffer from the dreaded droppings at least once a month, with nearly half of cars in Britain pelted with poo at least once a fortnight, and an unlucky one in six splattered every single day.
And bird poo is more than just an unsightly nuisance for British drivers; it can also cost us dearly. A quarter of used car buyers expect a discount of at least £100 if a vehicle has been used as a dumping ground by our feathered friends.
The study was commissioned so Travelodge could determine whether or not promotion for their new pillow with arms, called a Cuddilow, is worth the effort. 63% of the 2,000 participants said a bedtime cuddle was necessary for them in order to sleep.
James Whipple said he had two "really big beers" at the Boise, Idaho airport. While on a flight to Salt Lake City on March 7 he wanted to use the cabin restroom.
The captain had declared it off-limits during the short flight because a light wasn't working.
So we're not entirely sure if we buy that he's responsible for all 31 plots he mentioned (helpfully listed here by the New York Times).
During her second day back at school since her hiccups began in January, Jennifer Mee had to leave class. Her nose started to bleed Thursday morning and then the hiccups returned.
Mee's mother, Rachel Robidoux, said her daughter is upset, discouraged and in pain.
"I'm at my wit's end," Robidoux said.
Mee returned to St. Petersburg's Northeast High School on Wednesday, and the 15-year-old ninth-grader hiccuped only twice.
"I realize it's supposed to be a festive time of conception and new growth in the womb of Mother Earth and all," Birch said. "But I just know that within an hour of arriving, things will get so bad that I'll be reverting to my 12-year-old self, hiding in the rec room downstairs, wearing my Iroquois false face mask and fingering my runes for comfort. It's not worth it."