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Poll: Most people prefer annihilation by killer tsunami than being lectured by climate change activists

titdal wave greta thunberg
Giant tidal wave or Thunberg? There's no competition
A new study found that most people would rather be annihilated by a giant tidal wave caused by climate change than continue to be lectured by climate change activists.

Study participants were given the option of having the earth flooded by massive tidal waves or listening to virtue-signaling, smarmy lectures by environmentalists for the next decade. Over 87% of respondents selected, "Bring on the tidal wave." A few people said they'd rather take the lectures, but after hearing a few minutes of the lectures, quickly changed their minds. Several respondents rushed straight to the ocean, arms outstretched, and asked the sea to take us all.

Gem

Superman criticized as unrealistic for portraying a journalist as heroic

superman
Comic book character Superman has increasingly come under fire lately, many seeing the character as extremely outdated -- especially the bizarre depiction of his being a journalist who is heroic.

"He just makes very little sense," explained reporter Phillip Byers. "For instance, Superman has super speed. Now I know what I'd use that for -- to quickly search through people's old tweets for material to use to destroy them. But Superman uses it to rescue people from burning buildings. It's crazy."

People have also criticized how Superman flies around listening with his super-hearing -- not to find people criticizing journalism so he can dox them as one would expect, but instead to find people in trouble and save them. "Truth. Justice. The American way. That's against everything journalism stands for," said writer Debbie Ventura. "The character is pure libel or slander -- I forget which."

Superman writers have vowed to do a more realistic portrayal of Superman as a journalist in future issues of the comic book, such as a storyline where he strikes out against his arch-nemesis, businessman Lex Luthor, with a hit piece all based on anonymous sources, and then Superman will join the Legion of Doom, a climate change-focused organization headed by Greta Thunberg.

Wine n Glass

They call me Rocket: Drunken raccoon revels at Christmas market in Germany

raccoon
Everybody needs to relax sometimes and crack open a cold one with friends, but alcohol might be tricky for those who lack stamina or for those drinking for the first time.

A drunken raccoon entertained people at a Christmas market in the German city of Erfurt on Saturday. The poor animal apparently indulged in too much mulled wine, and was barely able to stand.

The raccoon was "obviously intoxicated", a police spokesperson said, "however, a breathalyzer test on the animal was not carried out".

The creature was not afraid of people at all, and the rescue services, who arrived at the site easily picked the poor guy up and put it in a cage, so the animal could sober up a bit. It tried to fight back, however, but was simply too inebriated to do something serious.


Question

Will Greta accept the offer?

Eeyore!!
Donkey Offer
© Notalotofpeopleknowthat
Donkey Offer Article
© Notalotofpeopleknowthat
Source - 20 Minutos Editora

Lemon

Visually a-peeling: Reaction split online as duct-taped bananas sell for $120 THOUSAND at Miami art gallery

duct taped banana
© Instagram / @sarahecascone @artnet @galerieperrotin @mauriziocattelan @artbasel
The art world is known for taking the mundane and turning it into something unique and beautiful, but netizens are struggling to justify the hefty $120,000 price tag placed on several bananas duct-taped to a wall.

The work 'Comedian' by the Italian artist Maurizio Cattelan is on display at Art Basel Miami in an exhibition run by contemporary art gallery Perrotin. According to Artnet, two of three editions have already been sold to two French collectors with the third now priced at $150,000, which will be sold to a museum.


Take 2

Tiger, Tiger? looking slight: Indian farmer paints dog like tiger to scare away monkeys

Indian farmer paints dog like tiger to scare monkeys
Indian farmer Srikanth Gowda has painted his pet dog Bulbul with black stripes and yellow color to make it look like a tiger in an effort to protect his coffee crop from the attack of monkeys.

The farmer told, "I now take Bulbul to the fields twice a day -- in the morning and evening. I have seen monkeys running away at the sight of the dog. The monkeys now refrain from entering my plantations."

Indian reports stated that Bulbul's stripes were painted on using hair dye.


Bullseye

How to discuss "climate change" with a 'woke' teenager

Greta
After our daughter of fifteen years of age was moved to tears by the speech of Greta Thunberg at the UN the other day, she became angry with our generation "who had been doing nothing for thirty years."

So, we decided to help her prevent what the girl on TV announced of "massive eradication and the disappearance of entire ecosystems."

We are now committed to give our daughter a future again, by doing our part to help cool the planet four degrees.

From now on she will go to school on a bicycle, because driving her by car costs fuel, and fuel puts emissions into the atmosphere. Of course it will be winter soon and then she will want to go by bus, but cycling through the freezing builds resilience.

Of course, she is now asking for an electric bicycle, but we have shown her the devastation caused to the areas of the planet as a result of mining for the extraction of Lithium and other minerals used to make batteries for electric bicycles, so she will be pedaling, or walking.

Which will not harm her, or the planet. We used to cycle and walk to school too.

Handcuffs

Smart cop: Indian police officer catches murder suspect by sending old photo, promising to marry him

indian police
© India TodayBalakishan Chaubey, who was accused of murder, was absconding.
A murder suspect on the run from the law has been caught, after a female police officer offered to marry the wanted criminal. Police were waiting when the man arrived at what he thought would be his wedding ceremony.

Police in Chhatarpur, northeast India, had been hunting a man wanted for murder and other crimes. While authorities found themselves unable to track him down, a source informed them that the suspect had been looking for a bride - a piece of intelligence that was used to hatch an ingenious scheme.

A female officer, identified in local media as Sub-Inspector Madhavi Agnihotri, reportedly forwarded an old photo of herself to the alleged killer. After several telephone conversations, she was able to convince the man that she was seeking a husband, and proposed that the pair marry.


Unbeknownst to the suspect, police were waiting at the temple where the wedding ceremony was to take place.

Comment: Rumor has it that this is the photo she sent him:
Justin Trudeau India



Hearts

Stray dog found keeping abandoned newborn kittens warm on side of freezing road

Serenity dog saves kittens
© Pet and Wildlife Rescue
The protective pooch was found on a freezing night by a passing driver who saw her lying on the side of the road.

A stray dog is earning praise as a hero and has become one of North America's most adored canines after she was discovered protecting a litter of 5-week-old kittens left abandoned in the frigid Canadian snow.

The protective pooch named Serenity was discovered on a freezing night by a passing driver who saw the dog lying on the side of the road. Upon closer inspection, the driver found that Serenity had wrapped herself around the orphaned black kittens.

In a post to Facebook that has since gone viral, the Pet and Wildlife Rescue center in Chatham-Kent, Ontario, shared photos of Serenity while telling the story of the unconventional family.

In the post's caption, the shelter wrote:
"Our stray sweetheart is keeping her 'babies' safe at the shelter tonight!"

Eye 2

Shape-shifting reptilian overlords distance themselves from Prince Andrew

reptilian overlord prince andrew
Inter-dimensional shape-shifting reptilian overlords the Anunnaki have announced they will not renew their sponsorship of the Duke of York.

The Anunnaki join accountancy and audit firm KPMG which also ended sponsorship of the prince's entrepreneurship initiative, Pitch@Palace.

The controversy over the prince's ties to the convicted sex offender Jeffery Epstein is understood to have been a key reason behind the reptilian's decision.

Comment: It seems quite likely Prince Andrew has done a lot more than fail to tip a waiter to cause human suffering, given his dodgy association with Epstein. It's still funny, though.