Don't Panic! Lighten Up!


Who says banks don't have a sense of humor? Even when they're robbed

Idaho First Bank Logo
© Idaho First Bank
A bandit made off with $26,000 of Idaho First's money following a shootout with cops. A week later, the bank ran one of the funnier ads you'll see from a financial institution.

January 10 was typically cold in McCall, Idaho, a small resort town with nary 3,000 residents. With temperatures lingering just below freezing, Nathan Davenport decided to hit the ATM.

Literally. With his truck.

Sometime around 9 o'clock, Davenport pulled up to the ATM outside Idaho First Bank. Wearing dark clothes and a mask, he proceeded to cut the bolts off the ATM's door, then attached a chain to it and ripped the door free with his truck (a stolen truck, of course). Apparently this wasn't Davenport's first time hijacking an ATM. The caper took less than seven minutes, and Davenport split with cash totaling $26,120.

Across the street, Alex Hamilton and his girlfriend, Sara Chu, were leaving the grocery store across the way when they spotted Davenport yanking the door off the ATM. They called police, who caught up with Davenport minutes later not far from the scene of the crime.

The chase didn't last long. During the getaway, Davenport stopped his truck, got out and fired at officers, disabling the two squad cars in pursuit.
Arrow Down

New Conan O'Brien segment exposes media scripting yet again

Once again, the Conan O'Brien show has revealed countless examples of local media reading off the same script, proving that most corporate news outlets do nothing more than push national talking points.


Twin sisters separated at birth reunited thanks to YouTube video

© YouTube
Together again: Samantha and Anaïs

Twin sisters who were adopted and separated at birth were brought back together thanks to a YouTube video.

Raised on different continents, neither Samantha or Anaïs, both 27, knew that the other existed until last year.

Anaïs, a French fashion design student living in London, was left stunned when her friends came across a video featuring Samantha on YouTube and sent her a grab.

© YouTube
The original Facebook message
Shocked by their identical appearance, she did some online research and discovered they were both born in the same country and shared the same birthday.

'On February 21, 2013, I received a message via Twitter that would change my life,' explained Samantha.

'It was a mention from a stranger, letting me know that a girl named Anaïs had friended me on Facebook.
Airplane Paper

White House must address petition to deport Justin Bieber

© AFP Photo
After topping more than 100,000 signatures on "We the People," the White House is now obligated to respond to a petition to "Deport Justin Bieber and revoke his green card."

As of this afternoon, the petition had 104,700 signatures and climbing.

On all petitions, "We the People" states, "If a petition meets the signature threshold [in this case, 100,000], it will be reviewed by the Administration and we will issue a response."

The petition says about the Canadian pop star, "We the people of the United States feel that we are being wrongly represented in the world of pop culture. We would like to see the dangerous, reckless, destructive, and drug abusing, Justin Bieber deported and his green card revoked."

It continues, "He is not only threatening the safety of our people but he is also a terrible influence on our nations youth. We the people would like to remove Justin Bieber from our society."

New Zealand man fights off shark, stitches up own leg, goes to the pub, then back to work next day

James Grant... preparing to get back in the water!?
A junior doctor has recounted how he fended off a shark attack and stitched up his own wound on the beach before enjoying a pint of beer at a nearby pub.

James Grant was spearfishing with friends near Colac Bay at the base of New Zealand's South Island on Saturday when he was attacked by what he believed was a sevengill shark.

The 24-year-old was in about 2 metres (6ft) of murky water when he felt a tug on his leg, which he initially thought was a friend playing a trick on him. "I looked behind to see who it was and got a bit of a shock," he told Radio New Zealand.

He didn't see the shark and had no idea how big it was, he said, adding that he thought it could have been about 20cm (8in) across the jaw. However, he felt no fear. "[I thought] bugger, now I have to try and get this thing off my leg," he said.

He quickly made it on to rocks on the shore, where he took off the wetsuit - borrowed from a friend - and saw bites up to 5cm long.

Grant gave himself stitches using a first aid kit he kept in his vehicle for pig hunts. He and his friends then went to the Colac Bay Tavern, where he was given a bandage because he was dripping blood on the floor.

He already had a knife in his hand and stabbed at the shark. "I am not sure how effective it was. I guess it let go so something must have happened. [I] put a few nicks in it."

Juice Rap News is back! And now it's time for 'The News', featuring Sage Francis - 'cause truth rhymes

juice rap news

"The News". It's the most viral meme of reality on the planet: if it's not on "the News" it didn't happen - right? Welcome back to Season 2 of Juice Rap News, in which intrepid anchorman Robert Foster embarks on a new era of adversarial rap journalism by casting a critical eye on the paradigm that shapes our collective reality each night; featuring a smorgasbord of guests, from the stalwart General Baxter and Terence Moonseed having a friendly chat on about the Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP), to our special correspondents in Russia and the Colonies.

Meanwhile, what is going on in Finance, Show­biz and the Weather? Special surprise guests are in tow to cover all this and more, helping Robert delve deeper into this very odd phenomenon of 'The News' itself.
Mr. Potato

Which motorbike helmet is best for secret trysts? French President Hollande has spoken

A French crash helmet company has publicly thanked President Francois Hollande for wearing one of their products on his way to secret trysts with actress Julie Gayet.

Hollande, 59, was pictured wearing the 'Dexter' helmet made by French company Motoblouz on his way to clandestine meetings with his 41-year-old mistress.

Mr Hollande, on his way to a now, not so secret rendez-vous
Since the photos were published by France's Closer magazine when they exposed his affair two weeks ago, the Dexter helmets have sold out across France.

The helmet is now listed on the company's website as the Dexter President, where it is being billed as a 'Star des Medias' (Media Star).

Now Motoblouz boss Thomas Thumerelle has taken out a quarter-page ad in French daily Liberation to thank the president for choosing his product to his his face from papparazzi.

The ad reads: "Thank you Mr President - for having used our helmet for your personal protection. We salute your choice of a French-made helmet for your scooter outings. And you will find other models on our website for your future escapades."

Grammy Awards 2014: Spoiler alert - leaked clip!

Check out this leaked clip from the 2014 Grammy Awards

**Spoiler Alert**

Illuminati Puppet of the Year! Find out who wins...


Heart transplant patient falls in love at first sight with sister of the man whose heart now beats in his body

Brought together: Connor Rabinowitz and his girlfriend Erin Roberts were brought together when Connor was transplanted with the donor heart of Erin's brother Kellen
Connor Rabinowitz fell in love at first sight with the sister of the man whose heart was now beating inside his chest.

Lucky to get the donor heart of Kellen Roberts after his health collapsed because of a genetic heart condition, Rabinowitz was bowled over when he met Erin - just over a year after his transplant.

Although he was only 17-years-old at the time and she was 26 when they first met in 2004, the electric chemistry between the pair persisted until they got together in 2010 - with both feeling that deceased Kellen helped them to become lovers.

'We had an instant connection - we both feel that Kellen bought us together,' Connor said to the UK's Daily Mirror.

Connor was a fit teenager when he began to suffer flu-like symptoms in November of 2004.

One morning he woke in cold sweats to actually see his enlarged heart beating up through his chest and was rushed to hospital.

Doctors told the Minnesota teen that he would need a heart transplant or he would die and so he began the terrifying wait to see if a donor organ would become available.

Sadly for the Roberts family, but luckily for Connor, Kellen passed away after he suffered head injuries during a drunken fight in his home state of South Dakota.

Comment: Food for thought:

Transplanted Organs Impart Memories Onto Recipients

Do Our Organs Have Memories?
Do Hearts Have Memories? Transplant Patient Gets Craving for Food Eaten by Organ Donor

Magic Hat

Nun gives birth, says she had no idea she was pregnant

And then, naturally, names the baby after Pope Francis
© Getty Images

Fans of Discovery Health's I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant will love this: a Salvadoran nun gave birth in Italy this week, claiming she had absolutely no idea she was pregnant.

She said she was in her convent in Campomoro when she felt stomach cramps and was rushed to a hospital in the nearby city of Rieti, AFP reports. She ended up giving birth to a boy.