Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Roses

Passers-by call Colorado police over topless gardener

A nudist in Boulder who was threatened with eviction last spring for gardening outside wearing only pasties and a thong has caused another stir by gardening topless. At least four callers told police 52-year-old Catharine Pierce was in her yard topless on Wednesday. State law prohibits exposed genitals, but Pierce was wearing a thong and gardening gloves.

Bulb

Pants for Dogs go with the flow

Dog wearing pants
© Mike SiegelPants for Dogs are "panties with panache" developed by Neena Pellegrini of Seattle. They come in many sizes for all breeeds. The pants for English bulldogs and French bulldogs have no tail hole, because a tail hole is irrelevent for that breed.

Dog lovers are a resolute lot when it comes to solving their pets' problems.

Pants for Dogs: For protective purposes

Sounds crazy to anyone who hasn't had a dog with a bit of an incontinence/dribbling problem, or a female dog that hasn't been fixed. But those of us who have owned and loved such a dog have spent more than a few minutes wishing Depends came in canine configurations.

Neena Pellegrini to the rescue.

She's the founder of Pants for Dogs (pantsfordogs.com), a little Seattle-based cottage industry filling hundreds of orders for tiny- to massive-sized panties for female dogs, and, for male dogs, items she calls cummerbunds (although the waist isn't, in a precise sense, the true target, of course). Each garment in its own way protects rugs, floors and whatever else needs protecting from the drips and streams we'd rather not contemplate (and certainly not discuss).

The business started four years ago when Pellegrini's little male dog kept marking her little female dogs. A training issue, most would say. But improvement doesn't happen overnight. How do you protect the girls?

She found some canine "belly bands" marketed for more or less that purpose, but the fit wasn't great, the elastic chafed, and the durability was less than ideal. So Pellegrini re-thought the concept, came up with some design specifications and found a seamstress willing to stitch some up.

Folks started asking about them, and Pellegrini, a journalist by trade, decided to perfect the cummerbund design even further, get a few dozen made "more as an amusement, really, just to see what might happen," and came up with a design for girl dogs. Pretty soon she was plying her attractively patterned creations - into which a sanitary napkin is slipped - online.

Many of her customers are owners of female purebreds that need a little something when they come into season. So in recent days, during Westminster, Pellegrini has set up a booth in the dog-friendly hotel across from Madison Square Garden, joining a handful of other dog-products vendors.

House

Goat fans, cities butting heads

Walking pet goats
© Alan S Weiner for USA TODAYNeil Montacre takes two of the family's Pygmy goats for a walk in Portland, Ore., last month. Miniature goats, about 18 inches tall and weighing up to 60 pounds, are becoming popular, practical pets.
Herd the latest? Miniature goats, 'tame' as dogs, blaze trails in U.S. neighborhoods

Looking for a pet that can live in your urban yard, answers to its name, wears a leash for strolls - and might produce milk you can drink or turn into cheese?

Meet the miniature goat.

That's the case goat fans are making to city officials across the USA. Hillsboro, Oregon., held three community meetings this year, including one last week, to ask residents whether goats and chickens should be added to a list of acceptable pets. City spokeswoman Barbara Simon says views run "more pro than con."

The Carbondale, Illinois, Planning Commission was debating this month whether to allow residents to keep chickens when Priscilla Pimentel, a member of the city's Sustainability Commission, added goats to the mix.

"If you can have a 250-pound dog in town, why not a miniature goat that can produce milk?" she says. "It's just common sense." The Planning Commission hasn't made a recommendation yet.

Smiley

Errant police spike strip flattens tires

Some drivers in Newport Beach said they were left flat after a spike strip fell out of a police car and punctured their tires. A police report said the strip, which is designed to slow down fleeing drivers, fell out of a police officer's Chevy Tahoe on Feb. 27. The report said the officer had checked out the vehicle but forgot to close the back door before leaving the police station.

At least three motorists had several tires flattened and two have filed claims with the city.

Smiley

Queen's Corgi-Friendly Car on Sale in Britain

Queen Elizabeth
© AFPBritain's Queen Elizabeth II is seen looking out of a car window in this 2006 photo. A top-of-the-range Daimler formerly owned by the queen is up for sale, with unique features including a handbag holder and corgi-friendly fittings.
A top-of-the-range Daimler formerly owned by Britain's Queen Elizabeth II is up for sale, with unique features including a handbag holder and corgi-friendly fittings.

The Daimler Majestic V8 Jaguar, which the monarch used from 2001-2004, has only 14,000 miles (22,500 kilometres) on the clock and is on offer to the highest bidder.

"It's a truly unique vehicle," Peter Ratcliffe, a specialist dealer who bought the car from Jaguar, told The Independent newspaper.

"There is nothing else out there, or ever going to be out there, that you can buy and say this was the personal car of the Queen of England, specially built for her," he added.

Smiley

Things that can't be Tasered: This dog

In Chattanooga, Tenn., a police officer tried pepper spray and a Taser to stop a dog from chewing on his patrol car's tires and bumper. Neither worked.

Smiley

Florida Vampire Running For President

"He does have republican values..." Well, of course he does.

Bizarro Earth

Ridiculous as a Modern Art: Antony Gormley's rooftop sculptures are making New Yorkers jumpy

Image
In Manhattan 27 of the 31 statues by Antony Gormley will be put on rooftops
Police are trying to reassure New Yorkers that life-sized figures placed on rooftops by the British sculptor Antony Gormley are not people contemplating suicide.

The New York police department issued a statement after the first of the 31 figures started going up around Madison Square Park in lower Manhattan.

The police are trying to avert a spate of emergency calls similar to those made after the exhibition went on display in London in 2007.

"We were notified because of concerns the public might misperceive what they see and call police. We will respond no matter what because you can have an actual jumper at the same building," a police spokesman said.

Smiley

Air Canada learns that hockey trumps flying

olympic hockey gold
© Reuters/Todd KorolCanada's Sidney Crosby celebrates after scoring the game winning goal against the U.S. during overtime in their men's ice hockey gold medal game at the Vancouver 2010 Winter Olympics February 28, 2010.
Vancouver - Canada's largest airline has learned it sometimes has to take a back seat to the country's biggest sporting passion, ice hockey, the head of Air Canada said on Tuesday.

The airline was forced to delay a flight from Vancouver during the 2010 Winter Olympic Games because passengers watching the end of gold medal final on airport televisions ignored repeated calls to board.

"We incurred a flight delay for a reason Air Canada had not yet encountered in over 72 years of existence," chief executive Calin Rovinescu told a business gathering.

The Canadian fans were rewarded for their delay, as the nail-biting end to the 2010 Vancouver Winter Olympics saw Canada beat arch-rival United States 3-2 in overtime.

Smiley

Satire: Nation Shudders At Large Block Of Uninterrupted Text

Text
© The OnionThe giant mass of prose was devoid of so much as a large pulled quote for readers to glance at before moving on.
Washington - Unable to rest their eyes on a colorful photograph or boldface heading that could be easily skimmed and forgotten about, Americans collectively recoiled Monday when confronted with a solid block of uninterrupted text.

Dumbfounded citizens from Maine to California gazed helplessly at the frightening chunk of print, unsure of what to do next. Without an illustration, chart, or embedded YouTube video to ease them in, millions were frozen in place, terrified by the sight of one long, unbroken string of English words.

"Why won't it just tell me what it's about?" said Boston resident Charlyne Thomson, who was bombarded with the overwhelming mass of black text late Monday afternoon. "There are no bullet points, no highlighted parts. I've looked everywhere - there's nothing here but words."