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Thu, 08 Jun 2023
The World for People who Think


Satire: UK General Election 2010: first reality TV game show next week


Different ties, different policies?
BBC, Sky and ITV revealed the schedule for the three eagerly-awaited live reality TV shows to be broadcast on British TV networks in the run up to the May 6th polling day. There is a vain hope of brainwashing the British public into believing that there is any discernible difference between the three main parties. It is also hoped that the shows will improve turnout among voters who increasingly cannot be bothered because of the medieval disproportionate voting system that means their votes don't count anyway.

Mr Brown, David Cameron and Nick Clegg will take part in three different reality TV show formats as they battle to try and show there is more difference between them than the colour of their ties.

The first reality show, hosted by Alastair Stewart, will be based on American weekly syndicated reality show 'Cheaters', a spokesman said.

The politicians are suspected of cheating on the general public on a wide range of issues from expense scandals to supporting wars they know are illegal. Investigations will be headed by the Ironic Cheaters Detective Agency and will involve a cameo appearance from Tony Blair. A short 10-minute version of the show called Cheaters: Yep, that's politicians for you will be available through on-demand.


Satire: World Bank official says change "Trillion" to "Trololo" to Hide Extent of US National Debt

© unknown
Edward Khil's song 'trololo' could become the new name for 'trillion'
A leading figure from the World Bank has called on the U.S. government to change the financial terminology used to report US National Debt, in order to cover-up just how large it really is.

Hans Timmer, who has a high-profile role as director of the bank's Take Over the World Group, said U.S. economic problems could be solved by a change in the name of Trillions to something more confusing and light-hearted to counter the increasing numbers of citizens who are waking up to the fact just how huge 14 Trillion dollars of debt actually is.

"The word Trillions used to be so unfathomably large to people that they really didn't understand just how close the US is to total financial collapse and hyperinflation. " he said. "But more and more people are understanding that trillions means it just isn't ever going to get paid off. By giving it a new name like 'trololo" it will make 14 trololo's of debt sound much less threatening."

Alarm Clock

Sudden Mass American Enlightenment Puzzles Congress and Causes National Security Alert

happy crowd
© unknown
A sudden and unexplained mass enlightenment of the US population leads to jubilant celebrations
Washington - President Obama, U.S. congressmen and their aides held an emergency four hour-long meeting Wednesday to decide what action to take to stem a sudden and unprecedented mass enlightenment of the US population that threatens to destabilize the Government and create a fiscal crisis.

Details have emerged that behind closed doors Obama received a number of private phone calls from his financial overlords. In no uncertain terms Obama was threatened to do whatever it took - leaving all options on the table - to get the American people back to sleep or face devastating consequences to his financial savings portfolio. It is rumored that amongst the threats, Obama would be forced to exchange his investment fund share holdings for shares in BP that were about to be dumped by forewarned insiders. Alarmed in the extreme, Obama packed his teleprompters away and starting signing a myriad of papers that were thrust in front of him.

Magic Hat

U.S. ambassador officially declares Iraq 51st State of America: Iraqis lovin' it

© Sott.net
Baghdad, Iraq - The top U.S. envoy to Iraq said Sunday that the appointment of a CIA-asset dictator-in-waiting was fantastic news for America's implementation of pretend democracy in Oil-rich lands and was very excited about adding an extra star to the Police-State-Spangled banner.

Former Prime Minister Ayad Allawi's secular Iraqiya bloc won two seats more than Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki's State of Law coalition, according to election officials.

U.S. ambassador to Iraq Christopher Hill, reporting from the new $600 million US embassy in downtown Baghdad (just opposite Burger King), said the results suggest, "We can safely say that Iraq is now the 51st State of America."

"Voting has been a great distraction for the people from the total environmental ruin of this once great nation," Hill told SOTT.net in an exclusive interview. "We successfully changed the name of the war from 'Operation Iraqi Freedom' to the more accurate 'Operation New Colony', and to mark this occasion we are pleased to formally incorporate Iraq into the American Empire."

To commemorate the event, McDonalds fast food chain (which recently opened it's 17 billionth store) has designed a new highly addictive 'Iraqi freedom burger'.

"We feel the new Iraqi Freedom Burger TM with its mix of old Chinese newspapers, Denatonium and genetically modified high-fructose corn syrup will accurately reflect Iraq's bitter-sickly sweet recent history. Bitter from the point of view of the 1 million+ dead Iraqis who won't be able to enjoy the new burger, but sickly sweet from the point of view of the increase in McDonald's profits that those deaths have facilitated", the McDonald's spokes-clown said.

Mr. Potato

New Bin Laden Tape Calls For Holy Jihad Against Journalists Who Make Terrorists Look Plain Stupid


Cairo - A new audio message posted on Islamic websites, purportedly from al-Qaida leader Terrorist-in-Chief Osama bin Laden, calls on Muslims to wage jihad against the mainstream media and US and Israeli government officials for making them appear ridiculous.

The recording lamented the credulousness of Western infidels who believed the recent claims by the Western press that 'al-Qaeda' plans to use 'boob and butt bombs' in an effort to bring down Western civilization.

"Are citizens of Western nations so gullible that they believe we would blow up own asses? How the hell are we meant to scare the bejesus (praise be upon him) out of people and further both our own agenda and that of Western governments, if the CIA and MI5 insist on planting absurd stories about 'crotch' and 'boob' bombers in the press?? I mean seriously, this is getting ridiculous, it's not even fair," the message stated.

A CIA spokesperson, who declined to be named because he was not authorized to speak on the matter (but who decided to speak anyway because he had been drinking heavily) told this reporter: "Don't believe anything those dirty camel jockeys say, it's all true, they want to kill us and stop us from controlling the opium plantations in Afghanistan....eh.....I mean, they hate us because of our freezers and demolition balls," the intoxicated agent slurred before throwing up on a map of the Middle East.


CIA's Man 'Wins' Iraqi General Election


CIA stooge Ayad Allawi laughs it up after 'winning' the Iraqi general elections
"I am saddened that it is politically inconvenient to acknowledge what everyone knows, that the Iraq war is largely about oil" - Alan Greenspan former head of the Federal Reserve
Tin-pot Iraqi dictator-in-waiting, Ayad Allawi was the US-appointed 'interim-Iraqi Prime Minister' for 9 months in 2004-5. Today he defeated incumbent Nouri al-Maliki to the position of Prime Minister by 10,000 votes according to reports.

Now there's one more CIA stooge ruling over yet another formerly sovereign nation and people.


Legislating Away Your Freedoms - One 'Homegrown Terrorist' At A Time

What would a terrorist look like?
© John Sherffius

Two weeks ago Senators John McCain and Joseph Lieberman introduced a stunning piece of draconian diatribe euphemistically called the bipartisan Senate Bill 3081, or the 'Enemy Belligerent Interrogation, Detention, and Prosecution Act of 2010'1. The bill is 'bipartisan' in the sense that it is the product of at least two different types of psychopathic personality disorder.

Constitutional expert, lawyer and author Glen Greenwald described the bill as:
"probably the single most extremist, tyrannical and dangerous bill introduced in the Senate in the last several decades, far beyond the horrific, habeas-abolishing Military Commissions Act. It literally empowers the President to imprison anyone he wants in his sole discretion by simply decreeing them a Terrorist suspect - including American citizens arrested on U.S. soil. The bill requires that all such individuals be placed in military custody, and explicitly says that they 'may be detained without criminal charges and without trial for the duration of hostilities against the United States or its coalition partners,' which everyone expects to last decades, at least."2
And that's pretty much it, although, it's not merely at the president's discretion that all you disgruntled citizens can be detained indefinitely, but rather at the discretion of the entire psychopathic U.S. political and corporate elite. Of course, you wouldn't be called a disgruntled citizen, but rather an 'unprivileged enemy belligerent' and you would be defined as someone:
"who has engaged in hostilities against the United States or its coalition partners; or has purposefully and materially supported hostilities against the United States or its coalition partners"
While the wording here appears to target bone fide 'terrorists', that is to say, those people who have been set up as terrorists by the US, Israeli and British governments and their affiliated Intel agencies, it is broad enough to potentially include anyone who protests, or is otherwise 'hostile' to the US government.

Have you ever felt hostile to the US government? Have you ever, perchance, marched down a street with a placard that flagrantly denounced the US government in some way? If so, you may have been 'materially supporting hostilities against the United States.'

But what interests me most is not so much that the bill was introduced (it's been a long time coming for anyone with eyes to see) but rather the string of 'homegrown terrorism' cases that have popped up in the mainstream media since. Coincidence?

You've gotta be kidding.


Behold a Palin Horse: The Pathocrats' New Agenda

With the frequent and ongoing Climategate revelations covered in the past months' Connecting the Dots, we've noticed some interesting new developments coming from some even more interesting places. On March 15 The Weekly Standard published an article called 'In Denial: The Meltdown of the Climate Campaign' by Steven F. Hayward. For those who do not know, The Weekly Standard is the Neocon journal par excellence. Its founder and editor is William Kristol, PNAC member and son of CIA asset Irving Kristol. Kirstol and Richard "Prince of Darkness" Perle were two of the major shapers of Bush's war policy. Perle, of course, is a long-time spy for Israel. As an aid for Senator Henry Jackson in 1970, Perle was caught passing classified information to the Israeli embassy. Jackson refused to fire him, and since then Perle's influence has only grown.

One of the first to cry for a Global War on Terror, Kristol has stacked his editorial staff with an array of Israeli lobbyists and fellow Perle cronies: peddler of the false Iraq-Al-Qaeda connection, Stephen Hayes; George Bush speech-writer, co-author of An End to Evil (with his pal, Richard Perle) and all-round slime-ball David Frum; ex-psychiatrist turned Fox news regular and "Israel-can-do-no-wrong" cheerleader Charles Krauthammer; among others. In other words, The Weekly Standard editorial staff is staffed with a concentrated dose of Neocon psychopaths, schizoids, and Israel-first sycophants.

The recent editorial by Hayward, which provides a decent summary of the "unethical behavior, errors, and serial exaggeration in climate science" first exposed by the leak of the Climate Research Unit emails in November, ends with the following prediction:

Eye 2

Ponerology 101: The Psychopath's Mask of Sanity

© M.C. Roessler 2010
A Wall Street Psychopath?

In 1960 Bernie Madoff founded his Wall Street firm, Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities LLC. As chairman of its Board of Directors until his arrest in December of 2008, Madoff saw his firm (and himself) rise to prominence on Wall Street, developing the technology that became NASDAQ, the first and largest electronic stock exchange in America, in the process. A multimillionaire with over $800-million in shared assets with his wife and high school sweetheart, Ruth Alpern, Madoff was well-regarded as a financial mastermind and prolific philanthropist. He exuded an aura of wealth, confidence, and connections, and many trusted him as a pillar of the community. Sounds like a great guy, huh?

His humanitarian image was supported by his work for various nonprofit groups like the American Jewish Congress and Yeshiva University in New York, the various commissions and boards on which he sat, and the millions he donated to educational, political, cultural, and medical causes. As his firm's website made clear at the time (it has now been removed): "Clients know that Bernard Madoff has a personal interest in maintaining the unblemished record of value, fair-dealing, and high ethical standards that has always been the firm's hallmark." It's funny how things change with a little perspective and a pattern emerges only in retrospect. It wasn't until December of 2008 that the public became aware that this "personal interest" was anything but one of integrity, and that image stopped being taken for reality.

Comment: Go to Part 3 in the Ponerology 101 series

Star of David

Farzad Bazoft, Yellow Journalism and Middle Eastern Wars


Farzad Bazoft - a pawn on "the grand chessboard"
An article in Sunday's UK Guardian newspaper tells the story of Observer reporter Farzad Bazoft, an Iranian who was hanged in Iraq as a spy 20 years ago by Saddam Hussein.

In penning the article, the author Donald Trelford, who was editor of the Observer when Bazoft was arrested, seeks to "remember a friend and colleague whose death served as a warning to the world about Saddam Hussein".

The official story goes like this:

In September 1989, Bazoft went to Iraq to cover elections in Kurdistan. On the day his press party arrived in Baghdad, a massive explosion occurred at a military complex in the city.

Farzad met the deputy foreign minister, Nizam Hamdoun, and asked to visit the site. He enlisted the help of Daphne Parish, a British nurse he had met on a previous visit. They went on successive days to take photographs and collect soil samples, though they always stayed on public roads.

While waiting for an Iraq Airways flight to London on the 15 September, he was picked up at Baghdad airport and taken for interrogation by Saddam Hussein's Mukhabarat secret police.

On November 1st, the Iraqis issued a tape showing him "confessing" to being a spy for Israel. Earlier the Iraqis had claimed he was spying for Britain. On March 15th 1990 he was hanged.

As a veteran journalist, it is appalling that Trelford is content to limit his analysis of the case of Bazoft to the official story. With the US and Israel winding up the world's press to prepare the public for the first Gulf "war", there was good reason to be suspicious of any reports that demonized Saddam in the 1989-1990 period. With everything we know now about how willing Western politicians are to fabricate rationale for war, it is nothing short of yellow journalism to hold fast to the official story. Worse still is the fact that a much more plausible account of the case of Farzad Bazoft, from a truly reliable source - ex-Mossad agent Victor Ostrovsky - has been available to Trelford for 15 years.