
Syrian Turkmen fighters are seen with an anti-aircraft artillery weapon near the northern Syrian village of Yamadi on 24 November 2015
This looks simple enough then. We'll bomb the same people as Putin is bombing, in the same places, co-ordinated with Putin. But we won't actually be on the same side as Putin, and maybe we'll make that clear by painting gay rainbow flags on our bombs.
And we're backing Turkey - although we're not backing Turkey when they sneakily align with Isis against the Kurds, but that's easy to get round. We'll arrange a job share. Isis can have them on Mondays to Wednesdays, then we'll get them from Thursday until Saturday, and on Sundays they can have the day off or back someone else such as the Cornish nationalists.
Foreign Secretary Philip Hammond explained it clearly, when he answered Dennis Skinner's question "Is Turkey a reliable ally, given that it shot down a Russian jet, and has assisted Isis against the Kurds?" Hammond replied "I see that old habits die hard, and the Honourable Gentleman remains an apologist for Russian actions."
This must mean we are supporting Turkey, against Russia as well as on the days they're opposing Isis, though we're on Russia's side when they're against Isis so we could end up supporting and opposing Russia and Turkey against each other at the same time, causing us to fall through a break in space and we'll have to be rescued by Doctor Who.
To simplify matters even more, Hammond seems to suggest it's a disgrace to defend Russia's shameful action of its plane being shot down. Look at the litter they've caused, they could have crashed more tidily. Is it any wonder we're never on their side except for when we're on their side?















Comment: Would that this were only satire, rather than the truth of the matter. The West is being run by buffoons that Putin must alternately coax and shame into something resembling constructive action.