Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S

Snowman

Want to phone a glacier in Iceland?

A unique work of art, unveiled today, invites viewers to phone a glacier in Iceland - and listen to its death throes, live, through a microphone submerged deep in the bitterly cold lagoon which relays the splashes, creaks and groans as great masses of melting ice sheer off and crash into the water.

The dying glacier sounds clearer than the snuffly artist, Katie Paterson, who has been camping out in torrential rain and bitter cold installing the piece.

Wine

Prince William Spends Nearly $1,700 On Alcohol

Britain's Prince William shocked staff at a Dorset supermarket by splashing out nearly $1,700 on alcohol. The prince - dressed in a T-Shirt, baseball cap and jeans - filled four trolleys with wines, spirits, beer and snacks during his hour-long shopping spree at Weymouth's Asda store.

The 24-year-old royal even cleared the supermarket out of the popular summer drink Pimms. Store manager Darren Rideout told the Dorset Echo newspaper: "He came in the store at 2:10 p.m. with two bodyguards."He had four trolley loads of shopping which was mainly alcohol and snacks. He cleared us out of Pimm's."

Comment: The kid is obviously preparing for a party... kinda normal, don't you think?


Key

Stolen keys delay start of military mission

Poland's 1,200 troops assigned to NATO forces in Afghanistan will not achieve full combat readiness for up to several weeks due to stolen vehicle keys, the defense ministry said Thursday.

"We had been told a 10 percent theft rate was likely in convoys brought in from Pakistan, but we had not expected the spare car keys to go missing," defense ministry spokesman Jaroslaw Rybak told news channel TVN24.

"We shall have to send away for spares, so it may take from several days to several weeks for our contingent to become combat ready."

Bizarro Earth

NY analyst sues over Borat film

Borat's efforts to glean cultural learnings from the US have upset a New York financial analyst, who is suing 20th Century Fox over a scene in which he was chased down the street by the spoof Kazakh journalist.

Jeffrey Lemerond, a former healthcare analyst at the Carlyle Group , who now works for SAB, a hedge fund in New York, has filed a lawsuit claiming he suffered "public ridicule, degradation and humiliation" in the hit movie, which starred the British comedian Sacha Baron Cohen.

Magic Wand

Mich. Man in Wheelchair Takes Wild Ride

GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. - A 21-year-old man got the ride of a lifetime when his electric wheelchair became lodged in the grille of a semitrailer and was pushed down a highway for several miles at about 50 mph.

Bizarro Earth

Under Pressure! Plane diverted in China, lest it disturbs examinees

Parents in eastern China have pushed to get a plane diverted to avoid disturbing their children taking nationwide university entrance exams that could make or break their futures, state media reported on Thursday.

Xinhua News Agency said the students are taking their two-day exams, which started Thursday, at a school close to Huangshan airport in Anhui province. Their parents, worried that noise from an aircraft taking takeoff would mar the English comprehension test on Friday, appealed to the local education department and the airport decided to divert the plane. Across China, about 9.5 million students are taking the entrance exams, competing for 5.67 million spots.

Bizarro Earth

Wannabe Rapper Stalks Eminem

A wannabe rapper has been arrested after he stole Eminem's phone number from his ex-wife Kim Mathers and then used the number to ring Eminem so that the hip-hop star could listen to his demos.

Kyle Spratt lifted Mathers' phone from her handbag when she was playing at Paradise Bingo - the company that Spratt worked for. He later replaced it, after he had taken Eminem's phone number.

It's reported that the wannabe then phoned Eminem a few weeks later on a number of occasions desperately trying to get the rapper to listen to his music.

Bad Guys

India's 'marathon boy' barred from 300-mile walk

Police have prevented the five-year-old Indian boy, who sparked controversy when he became the world's youngest marathon runner, from embarking on his next feat, a 500km (310 miles) walkathon in eastern India.

Officers lined the sun-scorched road in Orissa's capital, Bubaneshwa, yesterday to block Budhia Singh's path, citing a government order that declared the child's 65 km run last year to be torture.

Comment: Sickening!

Since the record was made in May last year that would mean that the boy was only 4 YEARS OLD!!!

There is nothing in the above that indicates that the foster father has the boy's interests at heart.

But through the abuse of the boy the foster father can carve out a name for him self AND wealth.


Wine

Dutch students invent alcohol powder

Dutch students have invented powdered alcohol which they say can be sold legally to minors.

The latest innovation in inebriation, called Booz2Go, is available in 20-gramme packets that cost 1-1.5 euros (70 pence-1 pound).

Top it up with water and you have a bubbly, lime-coloured and -flavoured drink with just 3 percent alcohol content.

"We are aiming for the youth market. They are really more into it because you can compare it with Bacardi-mixed drinks," 20-year-old Harm van Elderen told Reuters.

Van Elderen and four classmates at Helicon Vocational Institute, about an hour's drive from Amsterdam, came up with the idea as part of their final-year project.

Wolf

Extra police patrols for full moons

Police in Brighton are to put on extra patrols on nights when there is a full moon to combat an increase in violence.

It follows research by the Sussex force which concluded there was a rise in violent incidents when the moon was full - and also on paydays.

Insp Andy Parr told the BBC he compared crime statistics for Brighton and Hove with lunar graphs to discover the trend.

A spokeswoman for Sussex Police said: "Research carried out by us has shown a correlation between violent incidents and full moons."

More officers will be out on Brighton's streets during full moons over the summer months, she added.