Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Cowboy Hat

Fight Sanity: Kangaroo farts 'could fight global warming'

Australian scientists are trying to give kangaroo-style stomachs to cattle and sheep in a bid to cut the emission of greenhouse gases blamed for global warming, researchers say.

©ninemsn
When asked for comment, the kangaroos did not seem to understand what all the fuss was about.

Comment: They are cute, they are fit - and they are quite tasty. Now Australian kangaroos are on a mission to save the planet with their marvelous rear wind. The fun never stops...

...Sanity refused to comment.


Smiley

Toddler fools the art world into buying his tomato ketchup paintings



©Julian Andrews
The toddler with some of his creations: Freddie is said to favour the 'spot and blotch' technique

To the untrained eye, they appear to be simple daubs that could have been created by a two year old. Which is precisely what they are. But that didn't stop the supposed experts falling over themselves to acclaim them.

The toddler in question is Freddie Linsky, who has fooled the art world into buying and asking to exhibit his paintings.

Pistol

Barking Mad! Rich U.S. dog hiding after death threats

A dog that inherited $12m (£5.8m) from late New York hotelier Leona Helmsley is in hiding after it was targeted by death threats, US media say.

Roses

Day-release convicts caught with drug crop



©REUTERS/Mike Hutchings
The sun shines though the distinctively shaped leaves of marijuana plants May 24, 2005.

Two convicts on day-release from a German prison were caught tending their illegal cannabis crop in an empty warehouse nearby, German authorities said on Monday.

Penis Pump

Man Accused of Swiping Blow-Up Dolls

MADISON, Wis. - A man accused of stealing several blow-up dolls from an adult novelty store says the burglary was a "drunken, stupid thing."

Snowman

Moscow student asks Santa to freeze his lecturers

A Moscow university student has sent a letter to Ded Moroz, Russia's version of Santa Claus, asking him to freeze all his lecturers, a source in Santa's official residence said on Tuesday.

Ded Moroz, whose official residence is near the Russian town of Veliky Ustyug, about 800 kms (500 miles) northeast of Moscow, comes to his temporary residence in Moscow's Kuzminskiy Park every November. This year he has so far received a total of 4,500 e-mails and 1,500 letters.

"A Moscow university student asked the New Year wizard to freeze all his lecturers for the period of mid-year exams," the source said.

Monkey Wrench

Chimps Beat Humans on Memory Tasks



©Tetsuro Matsuzawa/ Kyoto/ Primate Research Institute/ AP Photo
This photo provided by the Primate Research Institute in Kyoto, Japan, show a chimpanzee named Ayumu as he performs the second stage of a memory test. The chimp must recall the location on a touch sensitive monitor of numerals that have changed to squares.

In a memory competition of man versus chimp, Japanese researchers found that chimpanzees performed better than humans.

Calculator

Wachovia Bank Tells Man He Owes $211 Trillion

It's one thing to bounce a check and it's another to be so far in the red Bill Gates, Warren Buffet and Donald Trump combined couldn't come close to bailing you out. A Cobb County man got a letter from his bank with that very shocking news.

"And I open up the letter and I look at it and I'm like, 'No, you've got to be kidding me,' said Joe Martins.

Martins said he recently closed an account at Wachovia Bank and made good on an outstanding check. He just got a letter about the closure and his negative balance -- $211,010,028,257,303.00. That's $211 trillion.

©Unknown

Black Cat

Cat Survives 19 Days With Jar on Head

Tabitha Cain has fed a feral cat she calls Wild Oats for several years, but now she's thinking of changing the feline's name to Survivor.

That's because she says the cat survived for 19 days with a peanut butter jar stuck on its head.

"We tried to get her, but being the type of cat you can't catch, she kept running and hiding," said Doretha Cain, Tabitha's mother.

The family saw the cat several times with the jar on its head and tried in vain to catch it. But after not seeing the cat for a week, the Cains feared the worst.

Smiley

Video: NBC news host calls George W. Bush a monkey