Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Magic Hat

UK: Fire-eating magician was a benefits cheat

A magician with a talent for fire-eating, sword-swallowing and bathing in broken glass is facing bankruptcy after being exposed as a benefits cheat.

To his audiences Nigel Hardman was Prince Razaq, who appeared on stage in flowing robes, a turban and curly-toed sandals.

Image
©Peter Lovas
Hardman was claiming incapacity benefit, but astounded audiences with his stunts

Recycle

Canada's elite counter-terrorism squad security trashed

Canada's military is probing how detailed plans for its new elite counter-terrorism squad headquarters ended up in a trash bin on the streets of the capital, an official said Thursday.

Public Safety Minister Stockwell Day said an investigation was underway after the daily Ottawa Citizen identified the 26 top secret blueprints, brought to them by a curious passerby who spotted them in a curbside garbage can.

"If a security breach of some kind has taken place, then clearly that's a huge concern for me," Day told reporters.

The Canadian Joint Incident Response Unit is the Canadian Forces's main responder in the event of a terrorist attack of mass destruction, trained to deal with chemical, biological and radioactive threats.

Calculator

SKorean mum held after daughter, 6, pulls off bank job

South Korean police said Friday they had arrested a woman accused of telling her six-year-old daughter to steal some 140,000 dollars from a bank.

The girl took cash and cheques on Thursday from a small safe under the desk in the VIP room of a bank in the southern island of Jeju, they said. The room was temporarily empty apart from the child.

Take 2

From the 'I'm bored' files: Man auctions his life

A man in Australia is auctioning his life -- his house, his job, his clothes and his friends -- on eBay, after his marriage broke up, saying he wants to start a new life.

Unknown
©Reuters
Ian Usher is seen in an undated handout photo, released to Reuters on March 19, 2008.

Recycle

Hair of the dog

A Newcastle couple keep the memory of their beloved dogs alive - after turning their hair into woolly jumpers.

Smiley

Satire: Black Guy Asks Nation For Change

CHICAGO - According to witnesses, a loud black man approached a crowd of some 4,000 strangers in downtown Chicago Tuesday and made repeated demands for change.

Black Guy
©The Onion
The black guy is oddly comfortable demanding change from people he's never even met.

"The time for change is now," said the black guy, yelling at everyone within earshot for 20 straight minutes, practically begging America for change. "The need for change is stronger and more urgent than ever before. And only you - the people standing here today, and indeed all the people of this great nation - only you can deliver this change."

Smiley

The £100,000 cornflake

Bidding for a cornflake resembling the US state of Illinois has reached more than £100,000 on eBay.

cornflake
©Unknown
Judge for yourself: The cornflake in question

HAL9000

Spanish cathedral installs indoor traffic lights to control crowds

A medieval cathedral in Spain's Mediterranean port of Valencia has installed two indoor traffic lights to help control the influx of visitors expected during Holy Week which begins on Sunday.

The traffic lights were placed at the bottom of the 207 steps of Valencia Cathedral's octagonal bell tower, which offers sweeping views of the city, as well as at the top of the staircase, the cathedral said on its website.

Smiley

Poland: Robbers reduced to tears

A pair of bank robbers burst into tears and collapsed choking in Poland after they tried to use pepper spray on a cashier in front of an air conditioning unit.

The wind blew the spray back over the pair, who staggered from the bank in the south-western city of Wroclaw empty handed.

A local police spokesman said: "They told the cashier to open the till and then tried to put her out of action to grab the cash - but the pepper sprayed back in their faces because of the blast of warm air from the heater.

Magic Wand

UK: Engagement ring ends up gone with the wind

It is the one moment every man wants to get right -- and which London floor-fitter Lefkos Hajji could hardly have got more wrong.

The luckless 28 year-old's dreams of giving his sweetheart, Leanne, 26, the ultimate proposal have literally vanished into thin air.