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Pumpkin

Tennessee Man Says Image of Jesus Appears on Truck Window

Jim Stevens
© AP Photo/Johnson City PressJim Stevens stands next to his truck that has an image of Jesus on the window Monday, Nov. 2, 2009 in Jonesborough, Tenn.
Jim Stevens said he's not particularly religious and is clueless about why an image resembling Jesus Christ keeps appearing on his pickup.

Stevens, of Jonesborough, said nearly every morning, an image that looks to him like the face of Jesus Christ has appeared in the condensation on the driver's side window of his Isuzu truck.

A Johnson City Press photo of the truck showed a facial image.

Stevens said when he first saw the image, he figured it would evaporate and not return. But it kept reappearing for two weeks now.

Stevens said folks at the grocery store he goes to were amazed to see the image.

Pumpkin

Canada: Man Dressed as Purple Teletubby Wanted by Police

teletubbies
© GNS
An armed suspect dressed as an oversized purple Teletubby is wanted by police in London, Ontario in connection with a robbery on Halloween.

A woman reports she was walking home alone just after midnight, when she was approached by a man dressed as a Teletubby, carrying a handgun.

Police say he demanded money from the victim, then fled on foot with an amount of cash.

The suspect is described as a 6 ft. 2 in. man weighing 200 to 240 pounds, with short dark hair, clean shaven, and a muscular build.

No injuries are reported.

Mr. Potato

Man Appears Alive at Own Funeral in Brazil

A Brazilian bricklayer reportedly killed in a car crash shocked his mourning family by showing up alive at his funeral.

Relatives of Ademir Jorge Goncalves, 59, had identified him as the victim of a Sunday night car crash in Parana state in southern Brazil, police said.

As is customary in Brazil, the funeral was held the following day, which happened to be the holiday of Finados, when Brazilians visit cemeteries to honor the dead.

What family members didn't know was that Goncalves had spent the night at a truck stop talking with friends over drinks of a sugarcane liquor known as cachaca, his niece Rosa Sampaio told the O Globo newspaper. He did not get word about his own funeral until it was already happening Monday morning.

A police spokesman in the town of Santo Antonio da Platina said Goncalves rushed to the funeral to let family members know he was not dead.

Pumpkin

The Kim Jong-il that Clinton met was a fake, says academic

Image
© REUTERS / KCNABill Clinton met Kim Jong-il in Pyongyang in August but there is strong evidence that the North Korean leader has used lookalikes in the past
Was it Kim Jong-il? Or was it a fake North Korean leader that entertained Bill Clinton on that mission to Pyongyang to retrieve the two imprisoned American journalists?

In the absence of fact, the Hermit Kingdom has long been a free-fire zone for outlandish rumour. And they got more outlandish than ever after Mr Kim reputedly suffered a stroke in August 2008. Mr Kim was variously said to be close to death, about to be toppled by a coup, or desperately fixing the succession for his youngest son. Or was he really someone else?

The mainstay of the Kim-is-fake cottage industry is a Japanese university professor called Toshimitsu Shigemura, who once claimed that the real Mr Kim died in 2003, and that everything since has been make-believe. One Mr Kim, he maintains, even flatly confessed to a Japanese visitor, "I am a double."

Beer

Woman calls 911 to report herself as drunk driver

Neilsville, Wisconsin - The call came into the 911 dispatcher: "I don't want to hurt anybody. I'm drunk." And with that, Mary Strey, 49, of Granton, reported herself as a drunken driver about three miles northeast of Neilsville in central Wisconsin.

Clark County Sheriff's Chief Deputy Jim Backus said Monday that Strey's call on Oct. 24 led deputies to cite her for misdemeanor drunken driving with a blood-alcohol level double the legal limit to drive. She makes her first court appearance Dec. 10.

Blackbox

Mystery "dream" man becomes internet hit: Have you seen this man in your dreams?

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© HOA sketch of a man that is said to have invaded many people's dreams.
Balloon Boy has competition. It arrives at night from "This Man."

An elaborate campaign is swirling around the image of a simple, bushy-browed man, who is said to be invading people's dreams.

Over the past week, This Man has appeared in mainstream newspapers from England to China, as well as found a home on YouTube and countless blogs.

Take 2

Best of the Web: Jon Stewart Eviscerates Fox News (Video)

jon stewart
© Photo Credit: Comedy Central
Jon Stewart dedicated more than 11 minutes of Thursday night's show on what he calls the "hyperbolic" war between the White House and Fox News.

Though he certainly gave the White House a few nudges for saying they are "speaking truth to power" by fighting with Fox, Stewart spends the majority of the segment putting together one of the best and biggest takedowns of the network we have ever seen. The meatiest part involves For News Senior Vice President Michael Clemente's claim that Fox's designated "news" hours are from 9AM to 4PM and 6-8PM.

Stewart explains:
For the audience here, let me help you out--because it does get confusing. The three hours you spend in the morning with "Fox & Friends": not news. Your 4 o'clock to 5 o'clock post-tea and crumpets Neil Cavudo break: not news. The 5 o'clock to 6 o'clock emotional whirlwind and national group therapy session that is Glenn Beck: not even close to news.

O'Reilly, Hannity, van Susteren-en-en-en: not news. This is according to Fox News. Those people--the ones featured in promos about how fair and balanced Fox News is--are not news. These people--otherwise known as the only people you ever think of when you think of Fox News--are not news. They are Fox 'opinutainment.'
That's our favorite part. Please watch and tell us what yours is:

Smiley

Stay away from anonymous stock calls during results season

Indian stock markets (or perhaps just India's investing media) is in the grip of someone called Mr Expector, whose behaviour is now almost as strange as the famous Mr market. Investment homilies often refer to someone called Mr Market, a character which embodies the market.

The originator of Mr Market was the great Benjamin Graham, many of whose investing parables have a person called Mr Market. Invariably, Graham's Mr Market is an unstable, neurotic character who is susceptible every irrational knee-jerk that investors are capable of.

While reading news reports and viewing business news about the stock markets, I have recently detected a similar character whose sole task seems to be go around expecting mutually contradictory things to happen simultaneously. As I am writing this, Mr Expector has excelled himself with some amazing expectations about the quarterly numbers of both Reliance Industries and Bharti Airtel.

In both cases, the pink newspapers as well as the business channels were victims of Mr Expector's conspiracies. He told a certain set of people that both these companies' quarterly numbers will be good and another set of people that the numbers will be bad.

Sheeple

Sports fan dressed as sheep set alight

A 24-year-old football fan dressed as a sheep suffered serious burns to his arms and legs when his suit caught fire on a train in Fife.

Aberdeen fans said the man ran ablaze through the carriage as others threw beer on him to douse the flames.

The Edinburgh to Aberdeen service was stopped at Kirkcaldy at about 1900 GMT on Saturday to allow him to be treated.

British Transport Police said a 23-year-old man had been arrested in connection with the incident.

Mr. Potato

How to get your doctor to sing Happy Birthday while he washes his hands (satire)

I recently saw a poster in a medical building that stopped me cold. It was about influenza, and it said the following: To avoid spreading germs, wash your hands for as long as it takes to sing Happy Birthday to yourself.

I did a double take. Really? Wash your hands while you sing Happy Birthday as a timing mechanism?

Apparently, this is an important bit of advice for teaching the masses how to successfully wash their own hands. I guess they couldn't use Row, Row, Row Your Boat because that song just goes on forever, and people would be stuck at the sink washing their hands like disturbed obsessive-compulsive hand washing addicts.