http://www.sott.net Signs of the Times, featuring news and commentary on world events. Never wavering in our unending search for the light of truth in a pathocracy driven world! en-us Original content Copyright 2010 by Signs of the Times. For other content, see our Fair Use Policy at www.sott.net Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:07:06 -0500 http://www.sott.net/images/sottlogo_rss.jpg SOTT.net http://www.sott.net http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202721-Germany-Thief-Robs-Arcade-with-Cup-of-Coffee A thief in the German town of Hamelin robbed an amusement arcade by threatening the attendant with a cup of coffee, authorities said on Tuesday. "He wasn't going to pour coffee over her, he was going to hit her with the cup," a spokesman for local police said. Brandishing the steaming cup he had just ordered, the thief forced the 26-year-old to open the till and fled with cash. Police would not say how much money he had taken from the attendant, who had been alone in the arcade. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202721-Germany-Thief-Robs-Arcade-with-Cup-of-Coffee Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:05:30 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202585-Sculpture-Sells-Itself-On-eBay Artist Caleb Larsen has created an art sculpture which, when connected to the Internet, perpetually attempts to sell itself on eBay. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202585-Sculpture-Sells-Itself-On-eBay Sun, 07 Feb 2010 03:53:04 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202571-The-Newest-Diet-Trend-What-Would-Jesus-Eat- God cries when you eat Pop-Tarts. But He smiles when you drink carrot juice, and when you do a colon cleanse, He beams. That's the spirit driving one of America's biggest current diet fads. Granted, you've probably never heard of it unless you hang with Bible-believing Christians, but it goes by many names: the Hallelujah Diet, the Maker's Diet, the Lord's Diet, the Genesis 1:29 Diet. Some versions are vegan, some largely raw; all include organic whole grains -- and some of their kingpins have piously channeled this fad into multimillion-dollar enterprises, hawking must-have supplements at hefty prices. An eight-ounce bottle of phosphatidylcholine (a membrane extracted from soybeans or egg yolks) for $124.99? Sure, when its brand name reads like a promise: Divine Health. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202571-The-Newest-Diet-Trend-What-Would-Jesus-Eat- Sat, 06 Feb 2010 18:02:52 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202566-UK-Pheasant-terrorising-North-Yorkshire-village-attacks-people-in-street- A pheasant is terrorising a village - trapping people in their homes and attacking people in the street. The vicious bird has launched several unprovoked attacks on villagers in recent weeks. Men, women, children, prams, bikes, dogs and cars are said to have have fallen foul of the bird in Newsham, near Richmond, North Yorkshire. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202566-UK-Pheasant-terrorising-North-Yorkshire-village-attacks-people-in-street- Sat, 06 Feb 2010 16:26:05 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202365-German-Man-Saved-on-Frozen-Sea-by-Webcam-Spotter Watch the sunset, save a life. A woman admiring the sunset on a tourist webcam in northern Germany spotted a man who was lost on the frozen North Sea and probably saved his life by alerting authorities, police said Wednesday. The man had climbed over pack ice off the coast to photograph a sunset near the town of St. Peter-Ording, then became disoriented on the ice, Husum police spokeswoman Kristin Stielow said. Unable to locate the beach, the man began using his camera to flash for help. That got the attention of a woman hundreds of miles (kilometers) away in southern Germany who was watching the sunset over the sea on her computer. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202365-German-Man-Saved-on-Frozen-Sea-by-Webcam-Spotter Wed, 03 Feb 2010 12:19:12 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202355-Crazed-Yemeni-Terrorists-Will-Attack-Within-45-Minutes-Warns-Government The government yesterday raised the terrorist threat level to 'Hysterical', for the first time in nearly 5 weeks. In a speech to the Tavsitock Institute, the Home secretary yesterday hinted ominously of 'alarming levels of chatter coming out of Yemen'. However, when later pressed as to the nature of the chatter, Alan Johnson was forced to concede: 'It's hard to say exactly. I don't speak Yemenese, but all we know is they're talking, and they're talking a lot. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202355-Crazed-Yemeni-Terrorists-Will-Attack-Within-45-Minutes-Warns-Government Wed, 03 Feb 2010 07:19:18 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202249-My-Teacher-is-an-Alien-Say-1-in-3-Children Finding proof of extra-terrestrial life is a no-brainer for children - because they see aliens every day at school. A third of all children aged five to 16 are convinced that the body of one of their teachers has been taken over by an extra-terrestrial being. And even if they do not think aliens are by the blackboard, three-quarters of youngsters believe the little green monsters exist somewhere in the universe. Aliens regularly feature in children's books, films and TV series and so the results do not surprise child psychologist and TV presenter Laverne Antrobus. 'Children have many fantasies and love to escape into a world of make- believe that they can imagine for themselves,' she said. Comment: Most adults never escape their world of make-believe. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202249-My-Teacher-is-an-Alien-Say-1-in-3-Children Mon, 01 Feb 2010 12:42:08 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202223-Fear-of-Flying So now we have what surely sounds like the worst imaginable terrorist threat: the bomber whose weapon is concealed inside their body. Are we going to need MRIs before boarding a plane? Maybe it's time to make the inevitable psychological shift from prevention to risk management. Flying has always entailed risks - just as their are risks in driving a car or eating in a restaurant. How's this for what could be universally accepted as an acceptable level of risk: that the danger of being a victim in a catastrophic air flight is such that one is more likely to die because of mechanical problems or pilot error than because of a terrorist act. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202223-Fear-of-Flying Sun, 31 Jan 2010 22:51:26 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202215-California-Man-Finds-Jesus-in-Coconut A Paradise man claims he discovered a miracle in the produce section of his local grocery. In a letter to News10, Mike Zachweija said he went shopping to buy bananas a few days before Christmas. He glanced at a bunch of coconuts and noticed one that looked like it had a silhouette of a face on it. Impressed with the image Zachweija bought the coconut. On Christmas Day Zachweija said he decided to take some pictures of the coconut before the image faded away. In his letter he wrote: "As the first picture I took appeared on my small digital camera, I could hardly believe what I was looking at. The silhouette face now had some color and much more detail, with added Christmas sunlight. The face looked very much like that of Jesus." http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202215-California-Man-Finds-Jesus-in-Coconut Sun, 31 Jan 2010 14:54:23 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202065-Satire-Obama-s-Home-Teleprompter-Malfunctions-During-Family-Dinner Officials say the President's home teleprompter is simply a tool to make sure pillow talk with Michelle or conversations with his Mother-In-Law go smoothly. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202065-Satire-Obama-s-Home-Teleprompter-Malfunctions-During-Family-Dinner Fri, 29 Jan 2010 06:07:20 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202001-Satire-Bin-Laden-Claims-Responsibility-for-Balloon-Boy-Hoax CIA Analyzing Latest Terror Tape One day after claiming responsibility for the Christmas Day underpants bomber, Osama bin Laden appeared in a new terror tape today in which he claimed responsibility for the Balloon Boy hoax that held the nation spellbound last year. "The so-called Balloon Boy claimed that he 'did it for the show,'" a stern-faced bin Laden says on the tape, which surfaced Sunday morning. "In point of fact, he did it for jihad!" In the somewhat rambling tape, Mr. bin Laden spends 45 minutes claiming responsibility for other things, including the massive Tylenol recall, John Edwards' illegitimate baby, and the Detroit Lions' NFL season. According to a CIA analyst familiar with the tape, a new characterization of Osama bin Laden may be beginning to emerge: "He's like a movie executive: no matter how little he was involved, he claims credit." http://www.sott.net/articles/show/202001-Satire-Bin-Laden-Claims-Responsibility-for-Balloon-Boy-Hoax Thu, 28 Jan 2010 09:23:22 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201708-California-16-Year-Old-Girl-Starts-Solo-Sail-Around-Globe A 16-year-old has set out to become the youngest person to sail around the world alone. Abby Sunderland of Thousand Oaks sailed into the sunny Pacific Ocean on Saturday after being delayed a few days by a series of violent storms in California. Her boat-builder father, Laurence, along with other family members and fiends, cheered at the Del Rey Yacht Club as they watched the 40-foot craft called Wild Eyes depart. She plans to be at sea for five or six months. She will be alone but able to communicate via satellite telephone and a blog. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201708-California-16-Year-Old-Girl-Starts-Solo-Sail-Around-Globe Sun, 24 Jan 2010 11:53:18 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201545-Little-Lizards-Make-Big-Money-for-Villagers A tiny Indonesian lizard has become big business for impoverished villagers in Indonesia, where growing Asian demand for reptile-based traditional medicines has driven a boom in gecko farming. Geckos -- the pale, soft-skinned lizard with a distinctive call -- are abundant in Indonesia and are believed by Chinese and Korean traditional medicine devotees to help cure cancer as well as skin and respiratory diseases. In rural Banjarsawah village, on the eastern half of Java island, struggling farmers have discovered geckos make a surprisingly lucrative commodity. Tohasyim, 32, a farmhand who earns 10,000 rupiah (about $1) a day feeding other people's cattle, now makes 1 million rupiah or about $110 a month hunting geckos in a local forest. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201545-Little-Lizards-Make-Big-Money-for-Villagers Fri, 22 Jan 2010 05:24:05 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201469-Front-fell-off Ever wonder about the safety of those tankers that carry thousands of gallons of crude oil, then watch this. It's supposed to be a spoof.. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201469-Front-fell-off Thu, 21 Jan 2010 10:20:37 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201388-Break-In-911-Call A man calls 911 when he gets stuck in a window while trying to break into a house. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201388-Break-In-911-Call Wed, 20 Jan 2010 13:22:45 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201341-Comic-Our-dream-to-deprive-millions-of-healthcare-is-within-reach- Popular online comic Andy Borowitz often has his own farcical take on current events -- and today is no exception. Turning his sights on the special election to fill the Massachusetts Senate seat vacated by Sen. Ted Kennedy (D-MA), Borowitz suggests that a Republican victory will be a victory for healthcare reform defeat. In so doing, he creates invented remarks for Republican candidate Scott Brown, who has said he'll join a Republican-led filibuster of the Democrats healthcare overhaul in the Senate. Writes Borowitz: Boston (The Borowitz Report) - Firing up voters on the eve of the special election to fill the late Edward M. Kennedy's Senate seat, Republican candidate Scott Brown spoke at a campaign rally today, proclaiming, "With your help, our dream of depriving millions of health care is within reach." "Let's send a message, Massachusetts!" Mr. Brown exhorted the crowd. "Let's tell people across the country that if they want health coverage, they are shit out of luck!" An aide to Mr. Brown said that internal polling reveals that the Republican's anti-healthcare message may be catching on: "Right now, Scott is showing a double-digit lead among people who describe themselves as douchebags." http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201341-Comic-Our-dream-to-deprive-millions-of-healthcare-is-within-reach- Tue, 19 Jan 2010 16:53:15 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201340-Stewart-Kennedy-legacy-losing-to-naked-guy-that-owns-a-truck- Democrats are concerned that they could lose the Senate race in Massachusetts to Republican Scott Brown because it might derail President Barack Obama's domestic agenda. The Daily Show's Jon Stewart wants to know why Democrats wouldn't be able to pass legislation with an 18-vote majority in the Senate -- which he notes is bigger than any congressional advantage former President George W. Bush ever enjoyed. Stewart also poked fun at Brown, noting a statement in which he followed a statement announcing his candidacy with, "this is my truck," and that he posed nude for a magazine in 1982. "So the Democrats are losing to Captain Freeball," Stewart remarks. "The Kennedy legacy goes down to a naked guy who owns a truck. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201340-Stewart-Kennedy-legacy-losing-to-naked-guy-that-owns-a-truck- Tue, 19 Jan 2010 16:38:47 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201174-French-Anti-piracy-agency-s-logo-broke-copyright France's new internet agency set up to protect the rights of artists is facing legal action for using a copyrighted design for its logo. The French government's web police force - called Hadopi - was set up to stop piracy and clamp down on illegal downloaders. The agency's logo was unveiled this by French culture minister Frederic Mitterrand, who said that Hadopi "finally had a face". But within hours of its launch, it was forced to apologise for using a typeface without permission that belonged to France Telecom. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201174-French-Anti-piracy-agency-s-logo-broke-copyright Sun, 17 Jan 2010 11:15:09 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201156-North-Carolina-Man-Celebrates-77th-Birthday-by-Biking-77-Miles When he reached the hill at Country Park, Cal Weimer pedaled faster as onlookers yelled encouragement Friday. "Whoosh" went the sleek Specialized Sequoia road bicycle as it whizzed by. The staunchest supporter was Weimer's wife, Susan . She waved blue posterboard signs (she's a teacher, don't you know) with encouraging messages in neat, white block letters: "Go Calvin." "Happy Birthday." "77 Years Young." Not your typical birthday party. But Cal Weimer's not your typical guy. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201156-North-Carolina-Man-Celebrates-77th-Birthday-by-Biking-77-Miles Sun, 17 Jan 2010 06:42:58 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201152-Take-my-cat-instead- A man who failed to pay a police ticket offered bailiffs, as payment, his cat in Russia's Tomsk region. However the offer was not accepted. The cat, named Barsik, wasn't highbred and was of no value, as the Federal Bailiff Service in the Zyryanskoye village later found out. The man was inspired by the precedent that occurred in the Siberian Kemerovo region where Bailiffs issued an arrest warrant for a five-month-old sphynx kitten. The little feline, with an estimated market value of up to $500, was to go under the hammer at an auction, but its owners paid the debt and it was released. The Tomsk Region bailiffs say they are happy that citizens are well informed and are following the news. In their turn, bailiffs promised to closely follow the fate of Barsik and will make sure its owner will pay the debt. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201152-Take-my-cat-instead- Sun, 17 Jan 2010 01:23:15 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201147-A-Message-From-Transport-Canada http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201147-A-Message-From-Transport-Canada Sat, 16 Jan 2010 22:46:25 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201094-World-s-tallest-shortest-men-meet-face-to-knee-in-Istanbul The world's tallest and shortest men met for the first time in Istanbul for a Guinness World Records event in the city. Sultan Kösen, who measures 8 feet 1 inch (2.47 meters), and the 2 foot 5 inch (75 centimeter) He Pingping stood side-by-side at a photo-shoot at Forum Istanbul shopping mall on Thursday, Guinness World Records said on its Web site. Pingping, from China, reached the height of Kosen's knee. He was shown clutching Kösen's fore-finger in a make-shift hand-shake in photos published by Guinness. Source: Bloomberg http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201094-World-s-tallest-shortest-men-meet-face-to-knee-in-Istanbul Sat, 16 Jan 2010 11:38:23 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201083-Why-Stop-at-Banks-13-Other-Great-Taxes Okay, so there are lots of problems with the "Goldman Tax" that President Obama wants to enact. Goldman Sachs and the other big banks that would pay this new levy--officially called the Financial Crisis Responsibility Fee--will probably just pass the $90 billion cost onto consumers. It might be hard to police loopholes and exemptions. It could put rapacious American banks a step behind the rapacious foreign banks they compete with. And it might disrupt all that bank capital that's been gushing into the real economy, helping it heal so rapidly. But those aren't reasons to kill the tax. They're reasons to have MORE revenue-raisers like the Goldman Tax. The government is desperate for money, after all, and taxpayers are going to cough it up one way or the other, no matter where the tax starts. So here are some other "responsibility fees" that would bring in needed funds while encouraging Americans to behave better: The double-secret-derivative tax. A surcharge on whatever securities Wall Street dreams up to replace CDOs, CLOs, CSOs, SFCDOs, CDO-squareds, CDO-cubeds, and commercial-real-estate CDOs. Since it will take the government 10 years to figure out what these are, this tax would be retroactive with no statute of limitations. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201083-Why-Stop-at-Banks-13-Other-Great-Taxes Sat, 16 Jan 2010 01:26:30 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201075-Satire-Dubai-Debt-Crisis-Halts-Building-Of-World-s-Largest-Indoor-Mountain-Range Dubai - Representatives from the emirate of Dubai announced with disappointment this week that its recent debt crisis has forced developers to halt construction on the city's long-planned 22-mile-long indoor mountain range. The culmination of a decade's worth of ambitious and expensive building projects, Dubai's estimated $100 billion debt officially brought work on the artificial mountain range to a stop on Tuesday. "This is a very sad day for the emirate of Dubai," Crown Prince Hamdan bin Mohammed al-Maktoum told reporters at a press conference held inside the gold-plated anti-gravity chamber in his palace. "Although I believe it is the basic right of all who visit us to be able to scale to the top of a 15,000-foot-tall manmade snowcap, these tough economic times have made it an impossibility. Never before has our proud municipality faced such a grave crisis." http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201075-Satire-Dubai-Debt-Crisis-Halts-Building-Of-World-s-Largest-Indoor-Mountain-Range Fri, 15 Jan 2010 20:20:18 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201051-Two-men-arrested-after-driving-car-down-frozen-canal-in-Scotland Two men have been arrested after trying to make the best of the cold spell by driving a car down a frozen canal - only to plunge into the icy water. The pair were driving on the Union Canal, which runs from Edinburgh to Falkirk, near Winchburgh, West Lothian, yesterday afternoon when the ice gave way beneath them, police said. The men, aged 22 and 24, escaped but were arrested and charged with reckless conduct after emergency services discovered the car. They will appear in court at a later date. A Lothian and Borders police spokesman described the prank as "stupidity". "There is no doubt that these two individuals had a lucky escape, and had the canal been deeper there could very well have been a different outcome," he said. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201051-Two-men-arrested-after-driving-car-down-frozen-canal-in-Scotland Fri, 15 Jan 2010 15:26:10 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201048-England-Police-rapped-for-riot-shield-sledge-stunt A group of policemen filmed using a riot shield as a makeshift toboggan have been reprimanded for the prank. A passer-by filmed the moment Thames Valley Police officers arrived at the slope in Berkeley Road, Boars Hill, Oxford, in a riot van. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201048-England-Police-rapped-for-riot-shield-sledge-stunt Fri, 15 Jan 2010 14:42:03 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201046-Sexed-up-Global-Warming-Miss-Earth-hits-the-catwalk-with-a-beauty-contest-from-a-different-planet This is wrong on so many levels it's really hard to know where to start. News has reached us that the UK regional heats are now open for the Miss Earth Girls 2010 beauty pageant. I kid you not. Try not to retch as you read through this press release : Applications are now invited from beautiful, passionate eco-warring young women across the UK to enter the 2010 Miss Earth Girls contest. Between January and April as many girls aged between 18-26 who combine a love for the planet with beauty, poise and grace, are encouraged to enter their regional heats online... Modernising the traditional focus of the "beauty pageant" and bringing beauty contests firmly into the 21st century, the main focus of the event is to empower the entrants to focus on and promote environmental awareness. During their participation, the girls plant trees, raise funds for their own chosen charities, attend environmental activities, act as spokeswomen for environmental thoughts and educate people on green issues, in particular the three Rs (reduce, reuse and recycle). http://www.sott.net/articles/show/201046-Sexed-up-Global-Warming-Miss-Earth-hits-the-catwalk-with-a-beauty-contest-from-a-different-planet Fri, 15 Jan 2010 14:33:47 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200748-Grayson-suggests-Satan-wrote-introduction-to-Cheney-s-book Speaking on MSNBC's The Ed Show Monday night, the sharp-tongued Democratic congressman from Florida, Alan Grayson, delivered a fresh blow to erstwhile Vice President Dick Cheney (who now offers frequent exclusives to Politico on his critiques of President Barack Obama). "What would you say to Dick Cheney to his face if you had the chance because he doesn't present himself to anybody that speaks the truth?" MSNBC's Ed Schultz asked. Grayson argued that Cheney seems to be simply promoting his book. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200748-Grayson-suggests-Satan-wrote-introduction-to-Cheney-s-book Mon, 11 Jan 2010 13:21:42 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200729-Ignatious-Reilly-Connecting-the-Farce The war on people who are working harder than us. That's right folks, the U.S. is officially peeved at China. Why? Because they work harder than us. At the core of the issue is all of the jobs going to China, the U.S. is essentially whining because...They're making us look like bums. Never mind, of course, that it is our own U.S. Corporations who have outsourced these jobs to make higher profits off of us selling Chinese made goods back to us, while stealing our jobs. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200729-Ignatious-Reilly-Connecting-the-Farce Mon, 11 Jan 2010 06:54:43 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200718-Hundreds-strip-in-NYC-for-no-pants-subway-ride New York - Hundreds of New Yorkers have been riding the city's subway trains in their underwear. They stripped down to their undies on Sunday for the ninth annual No Pants Subway Ride. The idea is to act like nothing unusual is going on. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200718-Hundreds-strip-in-NYC-for-no-pants-subway-ride Sun, 10 Jan 2010 22:05:00 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200701-Shocking-Leak-Al-Gore-Climate-Scientists-the-greatest-source-of-Green-House-Gas Rooters News Wire - A shocking development today in the global climate change pandemic occurred when an undisclosed source close to the Greatest Most Awesomest President Barack 'da Pimp' Obama told WSS News correspondent Ignatius O'Reilley that the Obama Administration is frantically trying to conceal the true source of green house gas: Al Gore and his cadre of climate change scientists. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200701-Shocking-Leak-Al-Gore-Climate-Scientists-the-greatest-source-of-Green-House-Gas Sun, 10 Jan 2010 16:02:33 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200665-Weirdest-Unclaimed-Luggage It's a sight all too familiar to travelers: the lonely luggage that endlessly circles the airport baggage carousels. But, have you ever stopped to wonder where it all ends up? Some might be surprised to learn that the answer is Scottsboro, Alabama, home of the nation's only retailer of lost and unclaimed luggage. The Unclaimed Baggage Center spans 40,000 square-feet, covering an entire city block, and sells approximately 1 million items annually, all left behind by travelers. "Upon first impression, a lot of visitors think our store is really large but they have to realize that we're not a chain, we're one location collecting unclaimed baggage from all over the country," said Brenda Cantrell, director of marketing for the UBC. "The airports and airlines are really good at their jobs. Over 99.9 percent of the bags that are checked get reunited with their owners." http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200665-Weirdest-Unclaimed-Luggage Sun, 10 Jan 2010 09:25:36 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200625-Ten-Reasons-Not-To-Hate-Joe-Lieberman- As we reported yesterday, pretty much no one likes Joe Lieberman anymore. I know what you're thinking: "but he's such a trustworthy man." We think so too, which is why we came up with this list: 10) Because he might follow Dodd's lead, and not run for re-election 9) Everyone hates him--try being unique 8) Because if you didn't hate him, he wouldn't be on Sunday talk shows every single week 7) Those adorable jowls 6) He is loyal to his constituents (who work in Aetna's corporate headquarters) 5) Because he supports universal health care (Okay, in Israel, but still...) 4) I couldn't come up with ten.... :-( http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200625-Ten-Reasons-Not-To-Hate-Joe-Lieberman- Fri, 08 Jan 2010 20:05:06 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200591-Crasher-Seal-Photobombs-Group-Of-Penguins Imagine these poor penguins' surprise when they went to go pick up their pictures from the nearest 1 Hour Photo. Finally able to relax after months of withstanding the unbearably cold ancestral breeding grounds, all they wanted to do was take a group shot. But in an homage to crasher squirrel, some @-hole seal had to show up and ruin it. And of course, this is the only picture on the roll where nobody blinked. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200591-Crasher-Seal-Photobombs-Group-Of-Penguins Fri, 08 Jan 2010 10:31:43 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200481-Man-buys-3billion-CD-ROM-on-Amazon-just-to-see-what-would-happen A man in the U.S. has 'bought' an item on Amazon with a price tag of nearly three billion dollars - just to see what would happen. Brian Klug spotted the copy of the Discovery Channel's 'Cells' CD-ROM for sale at $2,904,980,000 (£1,800,979,540). Out of sheer curiosity, convinced the price tag was a mistake, he put in his credit card details to buy it and stepped back to see what would happen next. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200481-Man-buys-3billion-CD-ROM-on-Amazon-just-to-see-what-would-happen Wed, 06 Jan 2010 11:04:10 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200061-Snowfalls-are-now-just-a-thing-of-the-past Britain's winter ends tomorrow with further indications of a striking environmental change: snow is starting to disappear from our lives. Sledges, snowmen, snowballs and the excitement of waking to find that the stuff has settled outside are all a rapidly diminishing part of Britain's culture, as warmer winters - which scientists are attributing to global climate change - produce not only fewer white Christmases, but fewer white Januaries and Februaries. The first two months of 2000 were virtually free of significant snowfall in much of lowland Britain, and December brought only moderate snowfall in the South-east. It is the continuation of a trend that has been increasingly visible in the past 15 years: in the south of England, for instance, from 1970 to 1995 snow and sleet fell for an average of 3.7 days, while from 1988 to 1995 the average was 0.7 days. London's last substantial snowfall was in February 1991. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200061-Snowfalls-are-now-just-a-thing-of-the-past Sat, 02 Jan 2010 09:36:14 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200175-Back-from-dead-Mother-and-Baby-2009-Christmas-Miracle A Christmas Miracle- the mother appeared to have died during childbirth. The baby seemed dead on arrival and then - miraculously - both were alive and well. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200175-Back-from-dead-Mother-and-Baby-2009-Christmas-Miracle Fri, 01 Jan 2010 13:49:20 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200112-Wisconsin-Man-s-Bank-Quip-Earns-Him-Champion-Liar-Title Milwaukee - A jab at the woes of the nation's banks has been named the top tall tale of 2009. The Burlington Liars Club bestowed its highest award Wednesday for this line: "I just realized how bad the economy really is. I recently bought a new toaster oven and as a complimentary gift, I was given a bank." The quip earned Larry Legro of Sun Prairie, Wis., the dubious - but serious - distinction of being the year's World Champion Liar. "I was ecstatic," said Legro, 58, a state health inspector. "I told people all year I was planning to win this contest." Legro told The Associated Press he had been submitting entries for four to five years, even if his wife didn't share his enthusiasm. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200112-Wisconsin-Man-s-Bank-Quip-Earns-Him-Champion-Liar-Title Thu, 31 Dec 2009 20:05:52 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200111-Nebraska-Troopers-Finds-Gift-Wrapped-Pot-in-SUV Scottsbluff - A Nebraska trooper found an unexpected holiday present at the end of a police chase. The Nebraska State Patrol says the trooper found 7 pounds of gift-wrapped marijuana inside an SUV that ran off the road during a chase in Morrill County. The patrols says the trooper tried to stop the SUV for failure to signal on Tuesday. After a short pursuit, the SUV turned into a cornfield. The patrol says the driver fled on foot but was captured a short time later. A passenger, who was pregnant, remained in the SUV and was arrested. The patrol says the two face charges of possession of marijuana with intent to deliver. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200111-Nebraska-Troopers-Finds-Gift-Wrapped-Pot-in-SUV Thu, 31 Dec 2009 19:48:50 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200072-Tweets-Sexting-Unfriended-in-U-S-Banned-Word-List If you recently tweeted about how you were chillaxin for the holiday, take note: Fifteen particularly over- or mis-used words and phrases have been declared "shovel-ready" to be "unfriended" by a U.S. university's annual list of terms that deserve to be banned. After thousands of nominations of words and phrases commonly used in marketing, media, technology and elsewhere, wordsmiths at Lake Superior State University on Thursday issued their 35th annual list of words that they believe should be banned. Tops on the Michigan university's list of useless phrases was "shovel-ready." The term refers to infrastructure projects that are ready to break ground and was popularly used to describe road, bridge and other construction projects fueled by stimulus funds from the Obama administration. And speaking of stimulus, that word -- which was applied to government spending aimed at boosting the economy -- made the over-used category as well, along with an odd assortment of Obama-related constructions such as Obamacare and Obamanomics. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/200072-Tweets-Sexting-Unfriended-in-U-S-Banned-Word-List Thu, 31 Dec 2009 12:36:55 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199998-A-Colonoscopy-at-Every-Airport- The Underpants Bomber may very well have opened up a whole new chapter in airport security. For example, how long will it be before rectums become the hiding places of choice? What do we do to detect this? The conglomeration of odors may very well either confuse or repel the sniff dogs. In fact, the sniff dogs may lie down and play dead. The security personnel will be required to wear gas masks. They may also call in sick for work more often than usual. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199998-A-Colonoscopy-at-Every-Airport- Wed, 30 Dec 2009 07:00:39 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199805-The-plot-thins- The more I read about the latest plane terrorist, the more I know it's all fake. Yesterday we were told the terrorist himself said the explosive was strapped to his leg, today we are told by the Telegraph, quoting nobody at all, that it was sewn into his underwear. Okay, maybe he was wearing long winter underwear. The Telegraph, again quoting nobody at all, tells us the explosive was the same as Richard Reid used. Yet in all this time, authorities have not come up with a detection method for this type of explosive? I can't wait to see what stories the other rags are coming out with. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199805-The-plot-thins- Sun, 27 Dec 2009 22:37:50 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199703-Jesus-Image-Appears-on-Banana-Peel Sitting down for an after lunch snack turned into a brush with all things holy when Lisa Swinton saw the face of Jesus on her banana peel. ''I was like 'Oh my God! It's Jesus on a banana!'' ''I got it out of the fruit bowl and was about to peel it and eat it when I saw his face,'' she told The Daily Telegraph. The impact of seeing Christ pressed into the banana did not stop the 39-year-old of Haberfield from still eating the fruit and depositing the holy peel. ''I put some photos up on Facebook - one of my friends said it looked like a monkey.'' Ms Swinton is not a stranger to holy visions appearing in day to day household objects. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199703-Jesus-Image-Appears-on-Banana-Peel Sun, 27 Dec 2009 11:39:58 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199591-Friends-pack-apartment-with-gifts-in-holiday-prank A Chicago man could be unwrapping the hundreds of Christmas gifts spread around his apartment for days, even weeks. Trouble is, they aren't really presents. They're his own belongings meticulously wrapped by friends as a prank while he was out of town. Louie Saunders' packages contain everything from couch cushions to the beer in his refrigerator. His friend Adal Rifai masterminded the scheme after Saunders gave him a spare key. It took 16 people, 35 rolls of wrapping paper and eight hours to finish the job. Saunders tells the Chicago Sun-Times he's only been able to unwrap about 10 percent of the packages. He jokes that the upside is that, with each package he unwraps, he finds something inside that's just what he needs. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199591-Friends-pack-apartment-with-gifts-in-holiday-prank Fri, 25 Dec 2009 01:16:23 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199553-Astral-mystery-endures-in-Nova-Scotia-church Parishioners at a one of Canada's oldest Anglican churches will be puzzled by an enduring enigma when they gaze heavenward this Christmas. The chancel ceiling at St. John's Anglican Church in Lunenburg, N.S., has a special pattern of gilded stars on it, and while locals now know what it represents, they have yet to find out who originally designed it, or how. The conundrum emerged after the church, built in 1754, burned on Halloween night in 2001 as a result of arson. The parish sought to reconstruct the building's interior as closely as possible, and it brought in parishioner Margaret Coolen in 2004 to re-create the ceiling over the altar. But the church didn't have a complete set of photographs of the original star pattern, so Coolen, hoping the pattern reflected the actual alignment of heavenly bodies in the night sky, sought the help of astronomer David Turner of St. Mary's University in Halifax. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199553-Astral-mystery-endures-in-Nova-Scotia-church Thu, 24 Dec 2009 10:56:59 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199546-Colbert-Beck-raised-the-stupid-bar-and-now-it-s-nearly-inapproachable- Stephen Colbert explained why it's so difficult to mock Fox News' newest celebrity at the Second City 50th anniversary event in Chicago last weekend. Colbert told a panel that Glenn Beck "raised the stupid bar and now it's nearly inapproachable." The Atlantic's Jim Warren was there. As for Glenn Beck, the panel discussed the challenge of maintaining a separation between reality and satire when so many TV pundits are simply, premeditatedly over-the-top. "I said, 'Let's start doing some Glenn Beck stuff but in praise of Glenn Beck,'" said Colbert. "But every time we do one, he will have done something dumber. He raised the stupid bar and now it's nearly inapproachable." "I worry that if we use that as a model... if somebody doesn't believe what they're saying, it's very hard to out-stupid them," said a decidedly analytical Colbert. "Because then there's no place to sink our hook into, there's no mountain to climb there. I can't climb Glenn Beck since there's nothing there." http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199546-Colbert-Beck-raised-the-stupid-bar-and-now-it-s-nearly-inapproachable- Wed, 23 Dec 2009 22:47:24 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199490-Pigeon-defecates-on-a-Google-Street-view-camera A pigeon has defecated on a Google Street view camera. Photographs taken for Google's Street View service showed the pigeon defecting on the screen of the Street view car in Los Angeles. It is the latest mishap to hit the Street View service, which launched its Irish version earlier this year. The Street View service, allows people to view pictures of their homes and neighbourhoods online via the search engine's maps. The 3D images have been captured by special patrol cars with roof-mounted 360-degree cameras, which take pictures of every street and road in the city. The faces of people captured in photographs are automatically blurred so that they cannot be identified, while car number plates are also rendered illegible. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199490-Pigeon-defecates-on-a-Google-Street-view-camera Wed, 23 Dec 2009 07:46:24 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199346-Japanese-Man-Takes-Video-Game-Character-as-Wife A Japanese man has married a character in a popular video game, taking her -- and his handheld game console -- on an overseas honeymoon. The man, who prefers to use his online moniker SAL9000, met character Nene Anegasaki while playing dating simulation game Love Plus. They got married a few weeks ago, broadcasting their ceremony live on Japan's version of video-sharing website Youtube. SAL9000, who did not want to reveal his real name for fear of being misunderstood, admits to be an otaku, a breed of Japanese youth obsessed with video games, computers and fantasy worlds. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199346-Japanese-Man-Takes-Video-Game-Character-as-Wife Sun, 20 Dec 2009 18:34:32 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199304-Winter-Blues-Ancient-Rites-Winter-Weather-All-Part-of-Solstice Around lunchtime on Monday, astrological winter will begin. At precisely 11:47 a.m. CST that day the sun will be directly over the Tropic of Capricorn - its southernmost point in its journey across the seasons - at 23.5 degrees south of the Equator. Most people won't observe the winter solstice, but their bodies and dispositions might well take heed. And many holiday preparations are rooted in ancient rites associated with the year's shortest day. Daylight will be down to 9.7 hours in Tennessee. The diminished hours of sunlight at this time of year can affect everything from how people feel to how much food they consume and sleep they get. http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199304-Winter-Blues-Ancient-Rites-Winter-Weather-All-Part-of-Solstice Sun, 20 Dec 2009 13:11:28 -0500 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199287-America-is-number-thirty-seven Here is a little song celebrating our position at #37 in the world in healthcare. "We're Number 37" Come one, Come all Down to the hall We're gonna make noise We're gonna bust balls We're gonna disrupt We're gonna jump in the fray I got a list of all the things that were supposed to say We're gonna get real rowdy Have a barrel of fun But were the USA so by the way be sure to bring a gun And buddy We're Number 37 http://www.sott.net/articles/show/199287-America-is-number-thirty-seven Sun, 20 Dec 2009 12:32:24 -0500