Science of the SpiritS


Fire

Dabrowski's Theory of Positive Disintegration: Wandering upward to a new you

Lisa Rivero
LisaRivero.com
Sun, 29 Nov 2015 22:27 UTC
spiraling
© Travis/Flickr
This is the fourth in a series of Sunday posts about Kazimierz Dabrowski's Theory of Positive Disintegration, using as a starting point his 1967 book, Personality-Shaping through Positive Disintegration, released in a new edition as paperback and ebook. All otherwise unattributed quotations from Dabrowski in this series are from the 2015 paperback edition. You can also purchase the book as part of a larger collection of Dabrowski's works at Bill Tillier's website PositiveDisintegration.com.

Wandering Upward
"The process of personality building, therefore, is characterized by a wandering 'upward,' toward an ideal..." ~ Kazimierz Dabrowski
Chapter two of Personality-Shaping through Positive Disintegration introduces the concepts of developmental instinct, primary integration, and disintegration, all of which are important to understand in the overall process of "wandering upward" toward a personality ideal. This is also the chapter in which we learn about the role of excessive excitability (over excitability), which will be next week's topic.

Below are just a few main points and terms from the beginning of the chapter.

Comment: Previous instalments of this series:

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Info

No such thing as a 'male brain' or 'female brain' - Your brain is a mosaic of male and female

Stephanie Pappas
Live Science
Tue, 01 Dec 2015 07:47 UTC
Brain
© Johan Swanepoel
There is no such thing as a "male brain" or a "female brain," new research finds.

Instead, men and women's brains are an unpredictable mishmash of malelike and femalelike features, the study concludes. Even in brain regions previously thought to show differences based on sex, variability is more common than consistency.

"Our study demonstrates that although there are sex/gender differences in brain structure, brains do not fall into two classes, one typical of males and the other typical of females, nor are they aligned along a 'male brain - female brain' continuum," the study researchers wrote today (Nov. 30) in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

"Rather, even when considering only the small group of brain features that show the largest sex/gender differences, each brain is a unique mosaic of features, some of which may be more common in females compared with males, others may be more common in males compared with females, and still others may be common in both females and males."
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Family

Learning to notice when we are using defensive behavior to avoid emotions

Hilary Jacobs Hendel, LCSW
PsychCentral
Sun, 29 Nov 2015 00:00 UTC
emotions, defensive behavior
Mary picks a fight with her husband at night so she doesn't have to deal with her sex anxiety. Looking for what's wrong with her husband distracts her from her discomfort and the feelings of vulnerability that are causing her anxiety in the first place. By not directly addressing her core feelings with her husband, Mary misses an opportunity to be understood and problem-solve.

Michael doesn't feel settled or at ease with himself unless he drinks beer after beer. The alcohol calms his physical tension and mental anguish, but that strategy for dealing with his underlying pain is not sustainable. Eventually his drinking will lead to health and relationship problems.

Halley stays home instead of going out on weekends because social situations stress her out. She feels safe at home and also lonely. Dealing directly with her fears would afford her the opportunity to engage more with others in a way that feels good for her.

Robert curses out strangers when he feels disrespected. Precious emotional energy is used up by his hair-trigger anger. Instead he could get curious about his overreaction. Learning to "let it go" is a valuable asset.

These are all examples of defensive behaviors.All of us use defenses to deal (or not deal) with emotions. Defenses are developed to avoid painful feelings. Defenses are brilliant adaptations our minds make to help us cope with vulnerabilities. While defenses serve a purpose, especially in the environment and at the time in which they were originally created, there is a cost for the protection they offer.

Comment:

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Evil Rays

Studies show that rudeness is contagious

Alex Pietrowski
Waking Times
Sat, 28 Nov 2015 16:46 UTC
rude woman
When you see someone smiling or you hear laughter, you often can't help but smile or laugh yourself. Now scientists from the University of Florida have shown that the same applies to certain non-aggressive negative behaviors, especially rudeness.

A series of several studies conducted by researchers Trevor Foulk, Andrew Woolum and Amir Erez has shown that the exhibition of rude behavior by an individual, activates concepts associated with rudeness in the minds of others. Those being targeted by rude manners and people witnessing such behavior are equally affected. Rudeness is contagious in this manner.

The research showed that once the mind is stimulated with negative concepts, a person is more likely to interpret subsequent actions as rude, even if they are ambiguous or benign, and one is more likely to act with malevolence during interactions with others, thus further infecting them with hostility and negativity.

Comment: This trend towards greater meanness and callousness on a societal level can be termed as ponerization:
Ponerization (from ancient Greek poneros - evil), is a ponerological term coined by Dr. Andrzej M. Łobaczewski. Ponerization is the influence of pathological people on individuals and groups whereby they develop acceptance of pathological reasoning and values.


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Hearts

Communicating with care in your heart: The practice of love

Peter Russell
Collective Evolution
Mon, 30 Nov 2015 17:00 UTC
Image
© karenmaezenmiller.com
In all communication, there is one thing that each and every one us requires. We all want to be appreciated, honoured, and respected. None of us want to feel criticized, rejected, ignored, or manipulated. To reduce it to its simplest terms, we each want to feel loved. I do not mean love in a romantic sense, or some outpouring of emotion, but simple caring. This is the universal bottom line of every human relationship. We all want to feel cared for.

If each of us would like to be treated with care and respect, then it should be our intent to do so for others. But what often happens is the exact opposite. Instead of trying to ensure that the other person feels loved and appreciated, we end up in a vicious circle of recrimination and attack.
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Butterfly

The unexpected gifts of imperfection


Experience Life
Mon, 30 Nov 2015 15:47 UTC
By confronting our scarier emotions — vulnerability, fear, and shame — we can learn to lead a more "wholehearted" life. Brené Brown shows us the way.

Image
The toughest moments in life rarely feel like gifts. Whether it's losing a job, struggling through a foundering relationship, or witnessing the death of a loved one, experiences that bring us to our knees tend to trigger our defenses, not our wisdom.

And yet, when we humble ourselves enough to open up during awful times — accepting that we're vulnerable rather than lashing out or collapsing in despair — we're primed to receive "the gifts of imperfection," explains best-selling author Brené Brown, PhD, LMSW.
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Take 2

Reverend Billy & The Church of Stop Shopping: 'Blessed are you who rise from your chairs and face the world'

Abby Zimet
Common Dreams
Fri, 27 Nov 2015 20:27 UTC
Image
In this particularly fraught holiday season, Rev. Billy and his Church of Stop Shopping have returned to New York to preach against our shoot-and-buy, state-sanctioned religion of extreme shopping and argue that we have become "not witnesses to the world (but) consumers of it." In recent years, the good Reverend - aka activist and performance artist Bill Talen - has broadened his social criticism to tackle not just consumerist culture but its connections to racism, police brutality, climate change and global capitalism, with corresponding actions at the Ferguson protests, Monsanto, Starbucks and Wal Mart. Last week, he did a gig at New York's Joe's Pub where he invited a dozen homeless New Yorkers, including kids, to share their stories of life on the street and urge audience members to, "Talk to us, don't talk about us."

Comment: Black Friday 2015: Rampant and violent consumerism
Amazingly enough, even with the countless videos acting as a mirror and showing the horrid nature of this human behavior, it continues every year. If Americans got as upset over the crimes of their government as they do over cheap plastic goods with built-in obsolescence, we would have colonized Mars by now.


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Smiley

Happiness comes from giving and helping, not material success

Steve Taylor Ph.D
Wake Up World
Sun, 29 Nov 2015 17:20 UTC
Image
Materialism doesn't lead to well-being, but altruism does.

So many of us strive so hard for material success that you might think there was a clear relationship between wealth and happiness. The media and our governments encourage us to believe this, since they need us to keep earning and spending to boost economic growth. From school onwards, we're taught that long term well-being stems from achievement and economic prosperity - from 'getting on' or 'making it', accumulating more and more wealth, achievement and success.

Consequently, it comes as a shock for many people to learn that there is no straightforward relationship between wealth and well-being. Once our basic material needs are satisfied (i.e. once we're assured of regular food and adequate shelter and a basic degree of financial security), wealth only has a negligible effect on well-being.

Comment: See more:
  • The pathology of the rich white family
  • The pain of modern life: Loneliness and isolation


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Hourglass

Nurse reveals the top five regrets people make when faced with their own mortality

Bronnie Ware
Wake Up World
Sat, 28 Nov 2015 16:56 UTC
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For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives. People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality.

I learnt never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance. Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

Comment: See more:
  • Inside the alternative death care movement: What's a Death Midwife?


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Butterfly

Spending time in nature may improve social cohesion, reduce crime

Douglas Main
Newsweek
Wed, 25 Nov 2015 05:09 UTC
nature
© Lucas Jackson / ReutersSpending time in nature, even in urban areas like Central Park, is associated with a greater degree of social cohesion and lower crime rates.
A wealth of research shows that just being in nature, even a city park, can make us feel better, both psychologically and physically. Such contact with nature can improve mood, reduce pain and anxiety, and even help sick or injured people heal faster.

But what effect does it have on groups of people and society at large? New research suggests that nature can actually improve the degree to which people feel connected to and act favorably toward others, specifically their neighbors, says Netta Weinstein, a senior psychology lecturer at Cardiff University in Wales.

Weinstein and colleagues conducted a large and wide-ranging study of 2,079 participants from throughout the United Kingdom. They asked each person a bunch of questions, such as how much time they spend in nature and how many parks and how much vegetation is found in their neighborhoods. They also queried them about how much they cared about and felt connected to their neighbors. The researchers also looked at each person's socio-economic status, the crime rate in the area, and other measures.

The study, published November 25 in the journal Bioscience, found that contact with nature accounted for a small, but significant increase in the degree to which people felt socially connected. Experience in nature was also tied to a reduction in local crime rates.

Comment: For more information on the benefits of spending time in natural settings, see:

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