Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Pumpkin

Man wins contest with 1,528-pound pumpkin

HALF MOON BAY, Calif. - Thad Starr's giant pumpkin really began putting on weight in August. A lot of weight. The pumpkin gained about thirty pounds a day on its way to victory Monday at the 35th annual Safeway World Championship Pumpkin Weigh-off in Half Moon Bay.
1528lb pumpkin
© AP Photo/Paul SakumaThad Starr, of Pleasant Hill, Ore., tips his hat after winning in the World Championship Pumpkin Weigh-Off contest in Half Moon Bay, Calif., Monday, Oct. 13, 2008. Starr's pumpkin weighed 1,528 pounds (693 kg) and beat the local contest record.

Starr's pumpkin finished at 1,528 pounds, beating the contest record he set last year by four pounds.

"We really pamper them," Starr, 41, of Pleasant Hill, Ore., said about the pumpkins he raises, adding that the secret to growing big pumpkins is good soil.

Tim Beeman, a spokesman for the contest, said Starr's pumpkin was four feet, four inches tall with a circumference of about 15 feet.

Starr beat out dozens of other growers from Washington, Oregon and California. Beeman said seven pumpkins came in at more than 1,000 pounds.

Forklifts were used to place the giant gourds on a 5-ton, industrial-strength scale. Starr said he bought a trailer to transport his giant gourd.

Igloo

Polar bear slips into moat playing with toy at zoo

Milwaukee, WI - A playful polar bear pawing at a toy lost his balance and slipped into a moat at the Milwaukee County Zoo.

Zoo spokeswoman Laura Pedriani says a net caught Zero when he fell Monday so he wasn't hurt. Zoo workers cut the netting and the 19-year-old polar bear was walking around later in the day.

Pedriani says Zero might decide to climb out of the moat when he's hungry enough.

The polar bear is now closer to visitors but his only exit from the moat goes into his regular enclosure. A fence still separates visitors from the bear and the moat.

Smiley

US: Classical justice in noise case

A defendant had a hard time facing the music in western Ohio.

Andrew Vactor of Urbana was looking at a $150 fine for playing rap music too loudly on his car stereo. But a judge offered to reduce that to $35 if Vactor spent 20 hours listening to classical music by Bach, Beethoven and other composers.

A probation officer says the 24-year-old lasted only about 15 minutes.

Vactor says he chose to pay the higher fine not because of the type of music but because he needed to be at practice with the rest of the Urbana University basketball team.

Newspaper

Are We Rome? Tu Betchus!

With modernity crumbling, our thoughts turn to antiquity.

The decline and fall of the American Empire echoes the experience of the Romans, who also tumbled into the trap of becoming overleveraged empire hussies.

As our sand-castle economy washes away under the tide of bad gambles and debts, this most self-indulgent society lurches toward stoicism (even bankrupt Iceland gives us the cold shoulder and turns to a solvent superpower). It's going to require more than giving up constant infusions of stocks, Starbucks and Botox.

HAL9000

Parents Outraged Over Baby Doll They Say Mumbles Pro-Islam Message

Demon Doll
© MyFOXKC.comThe doll parents say utters pro-Islam and even satanic messages.
A doll some are claiming utters pro-Islam and even satanic messages has outraged parents in Oklahoma and Pennsylvania.

People insist they can hear Fisher-Price's "Little Mommy Real Loving Baby Cuddle and Coo" mumbling "Islam is the light" and "Satan is king," according to KJRH.com and MyFOXKC.com.

Black Cat

Baby tigress tames Putin

Putin and baby tiger
Baby tigress tames Putin
Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin has received a rare Amur tiger cub as a 56th birthday present.

The former president cast loving looks at the baby cat as he posed with it in Moscow for journalists.

The two and a half-month-old tigress, which weighs 10 kilos, has yet to be named, although Mashenka and Milashka are said to be possibilities.

Cut

Cambodian couple split house in half to avoid divorce court

house
© AFP

A Cambodian couple hoping to avoid the country's convoluted divorce process have separated by sawing their house in half, local authorities said Thursday.

Husband Moeun Rim and wife Nhanh divided their house, some 90 kilometers (56 miles) northeast of the capital Phnom Penh, into two parts last month after deciding to separate, Cheach commune chief Vorng Morn told AFP by telephone.

"They agreed to split the house into two parts. The part that belongs to the husband has been removed, but the one that belongs to the wife is standing upright there. She stays there during the daytime," Vorng Morn said.

He said the couple, who are both around 40, decided to split after the husband accused the wife of not taking care of him when he was ill.

Eye 2

Of Dragons and Ogres: a 'fairy tale'

There once was a beautiful village that lay far away across the big water. The people in the village were a unique and proud sort, and had overcome much adversity and tyranny at the hands of their previous ruler. They wanted a village that protected their uniqueness and that would grow to be the largest and richest anywhere, so they hatched a Dragon's egg for its protection. They knew that once it had grown, this Dragon would in turn protect the village from ogres and help it to prosper and grow strong.

Smiley

Google Offers 'Mail Goggles' for Drunk E-Mailers

SEATTLE - Here's the scenario: It's Friday night, and what began as an innocent happy-hour margarita morphed into a few pitchers. After all, those tacos were salty.
Mail Goggles
© GoogleA screen shot of a typical 'Mail Goggles' sobriety quiz.

Bidding friends adieu, you jump in a cab, head home and decide a quick e-mail check is in order. And there it is: a message from your ex. Or your boss. Or that friend you're secretly mad at.

If you're the kind of person who types tipsy and regrets it in the morning, Google's "Mail Goggles," a new test-phase feature in the free Gmail service, might save you some angst.

Mr. Potato

A Fey-Palin comedy summit? Stay tuned

It seems like the inevitable comedic summit of this fall's presidential campaign: the real Sarah Palin coming on "Saturday Night Live" to meet her look-alike impersonator, Tina Fey.