Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Smiley

Lemon cola becomes holy water in baptism

Wojciech Moskwa
Reuters
Tue, 31 Mar 2009 14:22 UTC
Baptism holy water
© REUTERS - Gil Cohen Magen
A Norwegian church used lemon-flavored cola instead of water in a baptism ceremony after its taps were temporarily turned off because of freezing temperatures, daily Vaart Land said Tuesday.

Priest Paal Dale from the town of Stord, about 150 miles west of the capital Oslo, improvised during a recent cold-spell by dabbing the lemon fizzy water on a baby during a baptism ceremony, it said.
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Grey Alien

Miss Universe Visits Guantanamo Bay

Liliana Segura
Alter Net
Mon, 30 Mar 2009 14:30 UTC
Dayana Mendoza on the U.S. prison camp: "I didn't want to leave."

Dayana Mendoza_01
Ever wondered what it takes to be Miss Universe? Thanks to Venezuela's Dayana Mendoza, we can now be sure it's not a finely tuned sense of current events. The reigning beauty queen visited Guantanamo Bay last week, courtesy of the U.S.O, and, in a truly astonishing feat of self-parody, wrote the following description of her trip, including rave reviews of the jails, the military dogs, and of course, the beaches.

I am posting it in its entirety, in case the original post is removed for being just too damn embarrassing to beauty queens everywhere. (Perhaps somewhere Miss Teen South Carolina is feeling a little bit better.)
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Pistol

US: Man fires at McDonald's window over breakfast menu


Associated Press
Mon, 30 Mar 2009 14:10 UTC
Salt Lake City, Utah - Police said a customer fired one or two shots into a Salt Lake City McDonald's after the driver of the car he was in was told the restaurant was not serving lunch yet. Police said the female driver of a white Dodge Intrepid pulled up to the drive-thru and ordered from the lunch menu early Sunday but was told only breakfast was available.
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Heart

Spanish town cancels bullfighting


BBC News
Sun, 29 Mar 2009 14:09 UTC
The residents of a small town in central Spain have voted in a referendum to cancel their annual bullfighting festival because of the economic crisis, the BBC's Steve Kingstone reports.

Bullfighting Spain
© Associated PressThe mayor said the festival diverted resources from other services
The move was proposed by the mayor of Manzanares el Real - on the grounds that the event would divert resources from other municipal services. But the result has caused an outcry among supporters of bullfighting.

Fifty-two percent of those who voted agreed the bullfighting festival should be scrapped. Thirty-five percent voted to keep the event.

And only 13% chose a compromise option - to maintain the festival, but scale down its cost.
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Yoda

Nobleman's monument to witch trials


United Press International
Sun, 29 Mar 2009 16:58 UTC
Maggie Wall Monument Witch 1657
© explorescotland.netThe Monument of Maggie Wall, simply says “Maggie Wall burnt here as a witch – 1657” She was one of over 4,000 women executed for witchcraft in Scotland during the 16th & 17th Centuries. These executions are often well documented but surprisingly there are no records for Maggie Wall. It is also surprising to have a memorial, (the only one of its kind in Scotland) particularly one with a cross to a witch. Is it a mark of shame and repentance for those responsible? Located beside the B8062 to Auchterarder Road
A Scottish nobleman is building a maze in memory of the men and women executed as witches on his estate in the 17th century.

The Witches' Maze at Tullibole Castle near Kinross will have a pillar in the center with the names of those convicted and put to death in 1662, The Scotsman reported. Lord Moncrieff said the maze will be a monument to rationalism.
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Smiley

Cheese beats Baboon Metaphysics in odd book prize

Catherine Bosley - Mark Trevelyan
Reuters
Fri, 27 Mar 2009 14:49 UTC
Baboon running
© REUTERS/Howard BurdittA baboon runs across the fairway during a golf tournament in South Africa, December 3, 2006
The prize for oddest book title of 2008 was awarded to The 2009-2014 World Outlook for 60-milligram Containers of Fromage Frais, thanks to a late surge in popularity, The Bookseller magazine said Friday.

Philip M. Parker's Fromage Frais, which literally means "fresh cheese" in French, beat out titles such as Baboon Metaphysiscs, Curbside Consultation of the Colon, and Strip and Knit with Style in the annual competition run by the British magazine.

According to online bookstore Amazon.com, Parker's book costs a stunning $795. The website gives no indication as to what it is about, but it takes up to two months to deliver.
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Stormtrooper

La Marque woman's charge dropped in F-word case

Harvy Rice
Houston Chronicle
Thu, 26 Mar 2009 18:09 UTC
La Marque, Texas - Authorities have dropped a disorderly conduct charge filed against a woman who was handcuffed while being cited for using the F-word in a casual conversation at a Wal-Mart, the La Marque interim city manager said today.

City prosecutor Jay Brown dropped the charge recently after finding that there was insufficient evidence to prosecute Kathryn Fridge, 29, of La Marque, City Manager Eric Gage said.

"Of course, we would have hoped to prevail in the case, but not if there's not significant evidence," Gage said.

Fridge was not immediately available for comment.
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Chalkboard

Priory staff try to crack recipe of 'elixir of life'


Telegraph
Fri, 27 Mar 2009 22:12 UTC
Image
Fennel may be a key ingredient in the Elixir of Life
Staff at a 14th century priory were today trying to uncover the mystery of the secret ingredients used to make up a liqueur believed to be the "elixir of life".

Workers at Mount Grace Priory, near Northallerton, North Yorkshire, have planted a medieval herb garden in an attempt to discover the 130 herbs and flowers used to make Chartreuse liqueur.

Traditionally, only two monks at any one time know the recipe, which was given to the Carthusian brotherhood in 1605.

Mount Grace Priory was founded in 1398 and is the best preserved Carthusian ruin in the UK, with an original layout of 15 cells where monks lived a hermit-like existence.
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Blackbox

Medieval monk hailed by Barack Obama was a heretic, says Vatican

Richard Owen
Times On Line
Fri, 27 Mar 2009 21:52 UTC
Image
Medieval engraving of Gioacchino da Fiore (Joachim of Fiore)
The Vatican has dismissed as a heretic a mystical medieval monk apparently cited by Barack Obama as a moral authority and visionary.

According to Father Raniero Cantalamessa, preacher to the Pontifical Household, the US President referred in campaign speeches to Gioacchino da Fiore, or Joachim of Fiore, as a ''master of contemporary civilisation'' who had sought to create a better world. Drawing on the Book of Revelation, Gioacchino envisaged a "new age of the Holy Spirit" in which the Church hierarchy would cease to exist and Christians would unite with infidels in an "Order of the Just".

Dante refers to Gioacchino da Fiore, who lived from 1130 to 1202, as a ''gifted prophet'' in The Divine Comedy, and claimed that miracles occurred to those who prayed at his tomb. His followers have applied to the Vatican for him to be officially beatified, the step before sainthood.
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Sun

Pizza-making machine has chefs in a spin

Daniel Flynn
Reuters
Thu, 26 Mar 2009 17:31 UTC
Pizza Machine
Pizza vending machine
A vending machine that bakes fresh pizza in minutes for a few euros has got Italian chefs in a whirl before it hits the streets in the coming weeks.

The bright-red "Let's Pizza" machine uses infra-red rays and technology developed at the University of Bologna to knead flour and water into dough, spread it with tomato sauce and a choice of topping, and cook it -- all in less than three minutes.

Its developer, Claudio Torghele, says the machine has proved popular in trials in two Italian regions, but gourmets say it is an affront to traditional methods of cooking the classic dish.
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