Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Smiley

Kentucky anti-terror law requires God be acknowledged


Lexington News
Sat, 29 Nov 2008 03:33 UTC
The 2006 law organizing the state Office of Homeland Security lists its initial duty as "stressing the dependence on Almighty God as being vital to the security of the Commonwealth."

Specifically, Homeland Security is ordered to publicize God's benevolent protection in its reports, and it must post a plaque at the entrance to the state Emergency Operations Center with an 88-word statement that begins, "The safety and security of the Commonwealth cannot be achieved apart from reliance upon Almighty God."

State Rep. Tom Riner, a Southern Baptist minister, tucked the God provision into Homeland Security legislation as a floor amendment that lawmakers overwhelmingly approved two years ago.

As amended, Homeland Security's religious duties now come before all else, including its distribution of millions of dollars in federal grants and its analysis of possible threats.
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Cell Phone

Unbelievable! Vatican warns of the corrupting influence of mobile phones and the internet on our souls

Simon Caldwell
Mail Online
Tue, 25 Nov 2008 17:27 UTC
Federico Lombardi
© EPA'Grave threat': The Pope's spokesman Father Federico Lombardi has warned people risk losing their souls if they overuse the internet and their mobiles
Mobiles are bad for your soul, the Vatican warned yesterday.

Phones and computers are making the world so noisy and hectic that people cannot cultivate their spiritual dimension.

And without a spiritual life 'you will lose your soul', said Father Federico Lombardi, the Pope's spokesman.

The Jesuit priest, who is the director of the Vatican press office, made his remarks on the weekly Vatican TV programme Octavia Dies.
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Health

Pictured: The American toddler who got a set of car keys lodged in his brain ... and recovered unscathed


dailymail.co.uk
Fri, 28 Nov 2008 06:20 UTC
This brave little toddler has made an astonishing recovery after the horror of having a car key lodged in his brain.
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Smiley

Bollywood takes dig at Bush in low-budget spoof


Agence France Presse
Tue, 25 Nov 2008 21:41 UTC
Mumbai - Bollywood is taking a dig at George W. Bush in a low-budget spoof about a bunch of Indians who enter a reality television competition to meet the US president.

"The President is Coming," which cost just 600,000 dollars to make, is the fictional story of six young people who vie to be picked as the face of "The New India" and get to stand in a line-up of dignitaries to meet the president.

The backdrop is Bush's actual visit to India in 2006. Everything else is made up, except the notable "Bushisms" such as "some of our imports come from abroad" and "is our children learning?"
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Magic Wand

Dancing Scientists Invade YouTube

John Bohannon
ScienceNOW Daily News
Thu, 20 Nov 2008 03:26 UTC
Image
© AAASScience suite. Sue Lynn Lau (in pink dress) won the Graduate Student category for her Ph.D. dance about the biochemistry of diabetes.
Six weeks ago, the Gonzo Scientist challenged researchers around the world to interpret their Ph.D. research in dance form, film the dance, and share it with the world on YouTube (Science, 10 October, p. 186). By the 11 p.m. deadline this past Sunday, 36 dances--including solo ballet and circus spectacle--had been submitted online. A panel of nine judges--the three winners of the first "Dance Your Ph.D." contest, three scientists from Harvard University, and three artistic directors of the dance company Pilobolus--scored the dances on their ability to bridge the art and science worlds. Today, Science announces the winners of the 2009 AAAS Science Dance Contest in four categories: Graduate Students, Postdocs, Professors, and Popular Choice:
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Grey Alien

Flashback The Apocalypse Quiz: Kiss Your Butts Good-Bye!

Tim Cerantola
Ungratefulbastards
Sat, 25 Oct 2008 17:13 UTC
According to many psychics, religious fundamentalists and doomsday enthusiasts (who are all, more or less, the same people), the Bible's final battle between good and evil is now imminent.

In fact, these apocalyptic predictions are taken so seriously by so many; a profitable "end times" industry has emerged to feed this growing gullible audience willing to pay for a daily dosage of doom and gloom.

Granted, in view of recent world events, our collective demise doesn't seem like that much of a stretch, especially when the fear-mongering corporate media cheers from the sidelines, selling these wars along with their regular offerings of disaster, disease, pestilence and Sarah 'my god can beat up your god' Palin's latest nuggets of political wisdom. Perhaps it's only natural for the public to feel threatened and expect the worst.
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Stop

'MTV' closed down as broadcasting license expires


Russia Today
Fri, 21 Nov 2008 17:00 UTC
MTV
© RTMTV studios
MTV' will stop broadcasting as its license expired this summer after 15 years, but it's not the famous music channel experiencing problems. 'Malovereiskoe TV', a small broadcasting station in the heart of a Russian region. Its programming was mainly farming and local gossip and it only had around 600 viewers, but in terms of local TV it was a ratings success.

'MTV' might not be quite what you expect from a TV station - it's tiny and the equipment is minimal. Run by flagship presenter Tatiana and cameraman Sergey, the station has been broadcasting to around 600 farmers and villagers in the nearby area for 15 years, serving a valuable purpose.

"For a small village like this one, television is fantastic! It covers all aspects of local life. It is for each person living here like a window to the world," Tatyana said.
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Question

Man caught with penis in pasta jar

Stephen Ryan
The Herald
Wed, 19 Nov 2008 16:52 UTC
A man caught near Nobbys Beach with his penis in a pasta sauce jar led police on a 20 kmh car chase, Newcastle Local Court heard yesterday.

Police drew their weapons when they suspected Keith Roy Weatherley, 46, was armed.

Instead, they found him partially clothed with his genitals in a jar, a police statement said.

Weatherley, of Promontory Way, North Arm Cove, attracted attention parked in a no-stopping zone before noon on October 26.

Police believed Weatherley was doing something with his hands in his lap and thought that he might have a weapon.

Weatherley saw the police and drove away, despite them flashing their lights.

The chase lasted five to 10 minutes, with a top speed of just 20 kmh, before Weatherley was stopped at Centenary Drive, Newcastle. He refused to leave the car.
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Beer

Japan: Anti-drink cop caught drunk driving


Stuff.co.nz
Wed, 19 Nov 2008 04:26 UTC
A senior Tokyo police official tasked with keeping the city's roads clear of drunk drivers has been arrested for driving under the influence, police said.

The deputy inspector, on his way home from a camping site, was caught late on Monday after bumping into another car and veering off the road, said a police official in Ibaraki.
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Smiley

Sarah, Please Read This Before Talking to the Press (Again)!

Martha Rosenberg
OpEdNews
Fri, 14 Nov 2008 19:14 UTC
As someone with a GED I would like to offer you some speech advice that you could use for whatever "the next chapter of life is going to open up into," as you say in the New York Times. Actually that's a good place to start.

You have a tendency, Sarah, to add unnecessary words to sentences and in other places leave out important words.

The "next chapter of life ," would generally not "open" into anything but, rather, "be." Especially because chapters tend to be linear like books rather than holistic like things that open up.
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