Don't Panic! Lighten Up!S


Mr. Potato

Ignatious Reilly: Connecting the Farce

The war on people who are working harder than us.

That's right folks, the U.S. is officially peeved at China. Why? Because they work harder than us. At the core of the issue is all of the jobs going to China, the U.S. is essentially whining because...They're making us look like bums. Never mind, of course, that it is our own U.S. Corporations who have outsourced these jobs to make higher profits off of us selling Chinese made goods back to us, while stealing our jobs.

Smiley

Hundreds strip in NYC for no-pants subway ride

New York - Hundreds of New Yorkers have been riding the city's subway trains in their underwear.

They stripped down to their undies on Sunday for the ninth annual No Pants Subway Ride.

The idea is to act like nothing unusual is going on.

Mr. Potato

SOTT Focus: Shocking Leak! Al Gore, Climate Scientists, the greatest source of Green House Gas

Rooters News Wire - A shocking development today in the global climate change pandemic occurred when an undisclosed source close to the Greatest Most Awesomest President Barack 'da Pimp' Obama told WSS News correspondent Ignatius O'Reilley that the Obama Administration is frantically trying to conceal the true source of green house gas: Al Gore and his cadre of climate change scientists.

Magnify

Weirdest Unclaimed Luggage

It's a sight all too familiar to travelers: the lonely luggage that endlessly circles the airport baggage carousels. But, have you ever stopped to wonder where it all ends up? Some might be surprised to learn that the answer is Scottsboro, Alabama, home of the nation's only retailer of lost and unclaimed luggage.

The Unclaimed Baggage Center spans 40,000 square-feet, covering an entire city block, and sells approximately 1 million items annually, all left behind by travelers.

"Upon first impression, a lot of visitors think our store is really large but they have to realize that we're not a chain, we're one location collecting unclaimed baggage from all over the country," said Brenda Cantrell, director of marketing for the UBC. "The airports and airlines are really good at their jobs. Over 99.9 percent of the bags that are checked get reunited with their owners."

Mr. Potato

Ten Reasons Not To Hate Joe Lieberman?

Image
As we reported yesterday, pretty much no one likes Joe Lieberman anymore. I know what you're thinking: "but he's such a trustworthy man." We think so too, which is why we came up with this list:

10) Because he might follow Dodd's lead, and not run for re-election

9) Everyone hates him--try being unique

8) Because if you didn't hate him, he wouldn't be on Sunday talk shows every single week

7) Those adorable jowls

6) He is loyal to his constituents (who work in Aetna's corporate headquarters)

5) Because he supports universal health care (Okay, in Israel, but still...)

4) I couldn't come up with ten.... :-(

Camera

Crasher Seal Photobombs Group Of Penguins

Imagine these poor penguins' surprise when they went to go pick up their pictures from the nearest 1 Hour Photo. Finally able to relax after months of withstanding the unbearably cold ancestral breeding grounds, all they wanted to do was take a group shot. But in an homage to crasher squirrel, some @-hole seal had to show up and ruin it. And of course, this is the only picture on the roll where nobody blinked.

Seal crashes photograph
© Huffington Post

Magic Hat

Man 'buys' $3billion CD-ROM on Amazon - just to see what would happen

A man in the U.S. has 'bought' an item on Amazon with a price tag of nearly three billion dollars - just to see what would happen.

Brian Klug spotted the copy of the Discovery Channel's 'Cells' CD-ROM for sale at $2,904,980,000 (£1,800,979,540).

Out of sheer curiosity, convinced the price tag was a mistake, he put in his credit card details to buy it and stepped back to see what would happen next.

Amazon page1
© Amazon/Daily MailMr Klug posted a link on Reddit.com to his emailed confirmation order from Amazon proving that he had indeed purchased the CD-ROM for $2,904,980,000.00 - plus $3.99 shipping and handling (CLICK to enlarge)

Heart

Back from dead - Mother and Baby 2009 Christmas Miracle

A Christmas Miracle- the mother appeared to have died during childbirth. The baby seemed dead on arrival and then - miraculously - both were alive and well.


Bell

Wisconsin: Man's Bank Quip Earns Him Champion Liar Title

Milwaukee - A jab at the woes of the nation's banks has been named the top tall tale of 2009.

The Burlington Liars Club bestowed its highest award Wednesday for this line: "I just realized how bad the economy really is. I recently bought a new toaster oven and as a complimentary gift, I was given a bank."

The quip earned Larry Legro of Sun Prairie, Wis., the dubious - but serious - distinction of being the year's World Champion Liar.

"I was ecstatic," said Legro, 58, a state health inspector. "I told people all year I was planning to win this contest."

Legro told The Associated Press he had been submitting entries for four to five years, even if his wife didn't share his enthusiasm.

Magic Wand

Nebraska Troopers Finds Gift-Wrapped Pot in SUV

Scottsbluff - A Nebraska trooper found an unexpected holiday present at the end of a police chase. The Nebraska State Patrol says the trooper found 7 pounds of gift-wrapped marijuana inside an SUV that ran off the road during a chase in Morrill County.

The patrols says the trooper tried to stop the SUV for failure to signal on Tuesday. After a short pursuit, the SUV turned into a cornfield.

The patrol says the driver fled on foot but was captured a short time later. A passenger, who was pregnant, remained in the SUV and was arrested.

The patrol says the two face charges of possession of marijuana with intent to deliver.