Don't Panic! Lighten Up!

Георгиевская ленточка

Virtual Victory Day Celebrations

Fans of a popular video game decided to celebrate the Victory Day in style, and staged a full-fledged parade in-game. While not as majestic as the parade in Moscow, it was definitely remarkable in its own way.


Boy bewildered by 'old fashioned' pay phone


A young boy named Jake became the physical embodiment of the generational divide when he came face to face with his first payphone and was utterly bewildered.

The video shared on YouTube by AFV shows the young boy, addressed by the woman shooting the video as "Jake," puzzling over the 20th-century relic in an attempt to figure out the intended purpose of the anachronistic device.

Only when the videographer explains the concept of a phone booth does the boy have a realization: "Is this an old fashioned phone?"

The video has been viewed by nearly 300,000 users -- many of whom were likely using the pay phone's descendant, the modern cellphone.


Siberian dancers perform dance about Good and Evil

Dancers from the Siberian group UDI have won over the hearts of millions with their incredible neon light dance on Britain's Got Talent. The video of with their unique performance has gone viral since last week.

In an interview before their performance the group members said they want "to impress the British people and the judges." And they surely did! The video of the Siberian dance troupe UDI from Tomsk has hit over 2.8 million views on YouTube channel of the 'Britain's Got Talent' entertainment show.

Comment: This is a beautiful performance.


Scientists: Earth endangered by new strain of fact-resistant humans

Minneapolis - Scientists have discovered a powerful new strain of fact-resistant humans who are threatening the ability of Earth to sustain life, a sobering new study reports.

The research, conducted by the University of Minnesota, identifies a virulent strain of humans who are virtually immune to any form of verifiable knowledge, leaving scientists at a loss as to how to combat them.

"These humans appear to have all the faculties necessary to receive and process information," Davis Logsdon, one of the scientists who contributed to the study, said. "And yet, somehow, they have developed defenses that, for all intents and purposes, have rendered those faculties totally inactive."

Black Magic

Anthropologists discover Ancient Greek Super PAC that helped shape first democracy

ATHENS, GREECE—In a finding that provides new insight into the roots of Western civilization, a team of anthropologists from Cambridge University announced Monday the discovery of an ancient Greek super PAC that helped shape the world's first democracy. "At the same time Cleisthenes first instituted a representative form of government in Athens, it appears that a group of wealthy citizens and merchants created an organization to influence these new voters by bombarding them with around-the-clock political messages," lead researcher Daniel Rogers said of the early political action committee, named Athenians for a Better City-State, which is said to have received millions of drachmas' worth of funding in gold, lambs, dates, loaves of bread, and slaves from Athens' largest and most influential trade groups. "While the committee was prohibited from coordinating directly with candidates seeking public office, AFBCS nevertheless spent astonishing sums on orators hired to stand in the Agora and recite the negative traits of politicians that the super PAC opposed, as well as on writers who were hired to pen slanderous epic poems." Researchers also reportedly found evidence that the early super PAC's influence extended beyond elections, noting that it was the driving force behind a number of laws that lowered business taxes, protected the worship of the gods in schools, and authorized war against Sparta in an effort to plunder their geographic rival's large olive oil reserves.

Penis Pump

"Welcome to Sweden. Gay since 1944": Singing sailor to scare off Russian submarines

A Swedish peace society has come up with a new way of fighting off Russian submarines in the Stockholm archipelago: a subsurface sonar system called 'The Singing Sailor', which sends out Morse code and features the message "Welcome to Sweden. Gay since 1944".
Sweden hit international headlines in October last year when it launched the biggest military underwater operation in recent years after it spotted a foreign submarine in Swedish waters. The vessel was widely thought to be Russian, although the Swedish military was unable to confirm where it came from - or indeed locate it.

The country's ability to defend itself should Russia increase military activity in the Baltic remains a hot topic in the Swedish media, after the centre-left government announced a new 10.2 billion kronor ($111.9 million) defence deal designed to increase the country's capabilities. Just last week a British defence expert told The Local that a Russian attack on the Nordic nation "could come soon".

Comment: Well, at least Sweden can say that they won't be caught with their pants down when the "evil and scary" Russians will finally choose to come. Because their pants are down already, "since 1944".


God realizes he forgot to put souls in humans

The Heavens—While pacing across His Eternal Kingdom on Friday, the Lord God Almighty, He Who Commanded Light to Shine out of Darkness, suddenly realized He had forgotten to provide human beings with souls, sources from on high reported.


Dog and owner reunited after 4 years: 'Where have you been, Lilly?'

© David Zalubowski / Associated Press
Kelly Booker, left, and his 10-year-old son Azzah, shower affection on their long lost dog, Lilly, as they pick up the 9-year-old Shih Tzu at the United Airlines cargo terminal Thursday, May 7, 2015, in Denver. Lilly disappeared nearly four years ago from her owner's home in west Denver.
Kelly Booker cradled his long-lost dog Lilly and kept asking, "Where have you been, Lilly? Where have you been?"

Booker was reunited with the 9-year-old Shih Tzu mix at a cargo facility at Denver's airport on Thursday, weeks after she was found wandering the streets of Elgin. Booker last saw her four years ago when she either got spooked by fireworks and ran off or was stolen.

Lilly was treated for a severe ear infection at a shelter, which discovered a microchip that led to Booker. It's still not known how Lilly made the 900-mile journey.

Lilly -- or "Lilly G-F," for girlfriend -- had "plenty of love and treats waiting for her" when her flight arrived in Denver, Booker said. "I never thought anything like this would happen. I thought she was gone forever."

She disappeared from Booker's backyard on July 4, 2011. "She must have jumped the fence," Booker said. "We put fliers up and searched, but she was just gone."


Dam Bureaucrats!

© Wikimedia Commons
Henry P sends me this amusing piece of correspondence!

This is an actual letter sent to a man named Ryan DeVries regarding a pond on his property. It was sent by the Pennsylvania Department of Environmental Quality, State of Pennsylvania. This guy's response is hilarious, but read the State's letter before you get to the response letter, you won't stop once you start. WOW Love this man.

This is an actual letter:

State of Pennsylvania's letter to Mr. DeVries:
SUBJECT: DEQ ... File No.97-59-0023; T11N; R10W, Sec 20; Lycoming County

Dear Mr. DeVries:

It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as the legal landowner and/or contractor who did the following unauthorized activity:

Construction and maintenance of two wood debris dams across the outlet stream of Spring Pond.

A permit must be issued prior to the start of this type of activity. A review of the Department's files shows that no permits have been issued Therefore, the Department has determined that this activity is in violation of Part 301, Inland Lakes and Streams, of the Natural Resource and Environmental Protection Act, Act 451 of the Public Acts of 1994, being sections 324.30101 to 324.30113 of the Pennsylvania Compiled Laws, annotated.

The Department has been informed that one or both of the dams partially failed during a recent rain event, causing debris and flooding at downstream locations.. We find that dams of this nature are inherently hazardous and cannot be permitted. The Department therefore orders you to cease and desist all activities at this location, and to restore the stream to a free-flow condition by removing all wood and brush forming the dams from the stream channel. All restoration work shall be completed no later than January 31, 2015.

Please notify this office when the restoration has been completed so that a follow-up site inspection may be scheduled by our staff. Failure to comply with this request or any further unauthorized activity on the site may result in this case being referred for elevated enforcement action..

We anticipate and would appreciate your full cooperation in this matter. Please feel free to contact me at this office if you have any questions.


David L. Price
District Representative and Water Management Division.
And Mr DeVries' reply?

Mr. Potato

Japan Engineers Design Robotic Bear to aid in Assisted Suicide

A team of engineers working for the JSDD, with help from the Orient Industry Company have created an experimental robotic bear to assist in euthanasia and assisted suicide in Japan.

The growing suicide rate, as well as the senior population is becoming an increasing concern. Hospital Staff, and Suicide Assistant Volunteers from the JSDD are required to help euthanize those who are unable to themselves due to physical, or psychological reasons.