Identifying herself as an ambassador for God and Jesus Christ, a Nebraska woman has filed
a federal lawsuit against all homosexual people on the planet for breaking "religious and moral laws."
Sylvia Ann Driskell of Auburn argues in
a seven-page, handwritten petition delivered to the U.S. District Court of Omaha that "homosexuality is a sin and that the
homosexuals know it is a sin to live a life of homosexuality," according to the
Lincoln Journal Star. "Why else would they have been hiding in the closet(?)"
The 66-year-old, who is representing herself in the lawsuit, cites
Webster's Dictionary as well as a series of Bible passages in her letter, which is riddled with spelling and punctuation errors, the
Omaha World Herald reports. She challenges U.S. District Judge John M. Gerrard to not "judge God to be a lier (sp)," and slams gay people as "liers (sp), deceivers and thieves" in the case, filed simply as Driskell v. Homosexuals.
"I never thought that I would see a day in which our Great Nation or our Great State of Nebraska would become so compliant to the complicity of some people('s) lewd behavior," she notes.
"It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed because his compassions fail not."Head here to view the full petition.
The
court has not issued a summons for Driskell, according to NBC. Of course, that hasn't stopped a number of high-profile gay writers from sharing tongue-in-cheek responses to the lawsuit.
Steven Payne of The Daily Kos said he and his husband, Brian, would be "
liquidating our assets" ahead of a legal ruling in the case, which he jokingly suggested is a matter for the Supreme Court.
"We anticipate the restitution ordered to this woman will take us down to our very last penny," he quipped.
We'll be waiting with bated breath for the ruling on this one!
to see which of many potential legal grounds the presiding federal judge chooses to justify throwing this lawsuit out of court. I'm not a lawyer, but lawyers - perhaps in the interest of drumming up business - have a saying that "anyone can sue anyone for anything", however that's not even remotely true. The legal system imposes several requirements that every lawsut must meet in order to have a chance of seeing its day in court. This lady's complaint fails many of those.
Just off the top of my head, first there's the issue of venue and jurisdiction - whether the "Court of Omaha (sic)" is the proper legal venue, and whether it has competent jurisdiction, to hear this complaint. Then there's the standing issue - whether the filer is entitled to present this complaint (she claims to be the ambassador of God and Jesus Christ, says who?), and whether these purported plaintiffs are entitled to pursue this complaint before this court (this relates to jurisdiction too). Then there's the issue of harm - whether these particular plaintiffs (as represented by this lady as their 'ambassador') have - as lawyers say, an "actual case or controversy" at issue - and can claim any actual harm.
Yes, the court undoubtedly will dismiss this complaint, most probably with prejudice (meaning it can't be refiled), but it might do so in the most economical manner possible, or - if a magistrate is bored and feeling somewhat creative - do so in a rather more expansive way. We can hope for the latter... and that it will be reported so we can all enjoy it.