"What global crisis foisted on us by psychopaths in power? Chill dude, it's all relative!"
Seattle - Celebrating the new law in Washington state that allows him to freely smoke marijuana within his home, local man Erik Cirrone, 25, told reporters Thursday there is no longer any political or social issue he feels strongly about in any way whatsoever.

"Yeah, the right to smoke marijuana legally was pretty much the only thing even remotely tying me to events going on in the world," said Cirrone, who unreservedly took a drag from a joint before adding that he does not have an impassioned stance, or any stance at all, on topics such as the economy, health care, gay rights, unemployment, Gaza, global warming, or any other major domestic or international matter.

"I used to consider myself pretty political before this law was passed, but now I realize this was actually the one and only political issue I cared about. Don't really give a shit about anything else, frankly."

At press time, Cirrone was smoking pot.